Only In Tokyo, Japan

… would you find buses and trains that run on the dot. If the timetable says it will leave by 7:53 and arrive at your destination by 9:07, trust me, it definitely will! Somehow they’ve nailed down the whole statistics and counting business right down to the very nano-second.

… not sure who came up with this idea, but I saw it first in Japan - a camera that only takes the shot if the subject smiles. Sony has this new technology called “Smile Shutter Mode” that can recognize a model’s smile and quickly churn out as many as six shots in a row. My friend and I stood in front of the sample camera and experimented with it several times, each time having more fun than the previous.

… where the school skirts are practically shorter than a teenager’s mini skirt... and not get harassed by strangers on the streets. I guess eventually you become immune even to shapely bare legs in flirty skirts and hot boots.

… where it is 100% safe even in public areas. I had about $1,500 USD in my wallet and 2 newly-bought Nikon SLRs while I was riding the train from Akihabara (the “Electric Town”) back to my hotel in Tokyo. Amidst strangers, I also felt safe enough to pull out and fiddle with my obviously new and expensive camera.

… wherein it is nothing unusual to see people of all ages, both male and female and in between, wearing costumes during daytime. This is more commonly known as cosplay.

… can people with huge pot bellies bow all the way to their waist. It's amazing, really. Not that I'm a mean person, but to pass time, I sometimes count how many times the group would bow during a brief conversation in the elevator.

... can you find a seemingly innocent character like Hello Kitty on the front of a vibrator or some outlandish sex toy. Sex is everywhere. It really sells, especially in Tokyo apparently. They even have video games wherein the goal of the player is to get the cartoon character to bed with you. Jeez, if they spent as much time trying to get real people to bed as they spend playing their games, their lives will be so much more fulfilling, physically at least.

NOTE: No offense meant to anyone Don't get me wrong. I had a blast in Japan. I just found these things VERY interesting.

Letter to Papa

A lot of you may know that my father passed away last Saturday, August 2 at the age of 66. His official report indicated cardiopulmonary arrest as the primary cause of death. He had been battling colon cancer, prostate problems and partial stroke for more than 2 years now.

***

Papa, I'm sorry that I'm the last one to cry. I just remembered feeling so bewildered and confused in the emergency room - I didn't even realize that you had already left us. I thought you looked so peaceful and not in pain anymore. Everything just seemed so surreal and so hazy.

I just concentrated on what needs to be done. I remembered crying while filling out the death certificate. Did you know that the form is colored blue? I never knew that until last Saturday.

Since you weren't vocal about what arrangements you wanted and we never asked, we took the decision into our own hands. We thought of what place would befit you the most. We finally decided on one of the newer funeral homes that has an excellent reputation of customer service and cleanliness. Despite the higher cost, we never regretted the decision to have the wake at Sanctuarium.

Papa, we heard that there might be some unnecessary removal of organs during the embalming process, so somebody had to watch over the whole thing. Can you believe I actually volunteered to supervise the embalming process? Me, the scarediest cat in the whole family! You know how easily spooked I am on those things. I can't even keep the dolls I received during Christmas after watching Chucky, for goodness' sake. But I have to say, it's not gross if it's you. I was just surprised when the embalmers turned you over - I never realized how stiff a body would get. Think Dilbert's square-faced friend, Asok.

Papa, you would've been exasperated with the series of choices, choices and choices we had to make. What color of casket. What type of urn to use. How big a room. Catholic or Buddhist. What clothes to wear. Cremation or burial. What day and time for cremation. Where to bury... I still wonder if this is intentional - so that we will spend our time thinking about these logistical issues and not dwell on the pain of losing you. We just chose what we think you'll like best. Do you like them? I hope you do.

Papa, you might see me put up a brave front and still look cheerful and even giggly at times. It's not that I'm happy. I just prefer to grieve in private. Contrary to traditional Chinese customs of crying ladies, I do not want the whole world to know how much in pain I really am. This is also exactly how I coped when my marriage fell apart. I try to smile even though I'm crying inside... and eventually, my smile becomes a real smile. I'm sure you of all people know that about me.

Papa, did you see the memorabilia stand we put up for you? Do you like it? We remembered to get your favorite bowling shoes and bowling ball, your bowling shirts (one club shirt for each day of the week!), your Rotary Club vest and your Coast Guard uniform. We even amassed all the pics we had of you and showed to the world what great memories we had of you. I hope we didn't miss anything.

Papa, did you see how many people came over to pay their respects? I never knew you were in cahoots with congressmen, senators, judges and fiscals! The whole fire brigade came over. Even the board of directors of Rotary Club of Paco and Mama's batch mates arrived by the dozen. Actually, my hands hurt from shaking everybody's hands. I just kept thinking that the line seemed endless.

Everybody had only nice things to say about you. They spoke about how generous you are. They also mentioned how much of a team player you are. I'm soooo proud to be your daughter.

Papa, Ralph misses you so much. Did you see how loudly he cried and shouted your name when you were being cremated? Every night he asks me when he will see you again.

Papa, where are you now? Can you hear us? Are you reunited with Angkong and Ama? Will you watch over us?

Please guide us and give us strength to go on. Please also let Mama know that you are finally at peace so that she won't be too sad. You are... I mean, were in so much pain for the past 2 years; I'm just glad you're not suffering anymore.

Papa, we miss you lots and lots. Rest in peace.

Remember

Remember me when I am gone away,

Gone far away into the silent land;

When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more day by day

You tell me of our future that you planned:

Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.

Yet if you should forget me for a while

And afterwards remember, do not grieve:

For if the darkness and corruption leave

A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile

Than that you should remember and be sad.

In My Own World

Translation (in Filipino): may sariling mundo

I feel like I (and the rest of the IT community in P&G) have our own little world. Funny thing is that we are proud of having our own language and customized solutions and what not - even if it's not recognized industry-wide.

This is what a normal life cycle of a P&G solution looks like.

A lot of people have tried to know what it is exactly that I do in P&G - tried being the operative word.

Friend: "You work in P&G right after college, right? So what do you do?"

Me: "I'm in the IT Department."

Friend: "You mean you work on computers all day?"

Me: "Umm.... not exactly... err... I run the operations of some SAP applications. Sometimes I lead projects for financial systems. Other times I do governance roles for our outsourced partners like HP and IBM."

Friend (silence accompanied by a blank and/or confused look)

Me: "Well, it's kinda difficult to explain...let me try again... umm...."

Friend (still the same blank and/or confused look)

Me (throws hands up in despair): "Yes, you're right. I work with computers."

Friend (expression clears and brightens): "See, I knew you work with computers. Let's get lunch."

Sometimes I wonder if I myself know what I'm doing in P&G. Don't tell my boss.

I have this belief that one should always keep his resumes updated, regardless of how much he loves his current job. However, whenever I try to put this into practice, I encounter the same difficulty. It is almost impossible to translate what I have done for the past 8 years into something that another IT person outside P&G would be able to understand. I usually just give up and just tell myself I'll update it when "the right time comes."

Sometimes I feel that my parents suspect me of having an illicit relationship with somebody based in the US. They do not understand why I have so many late night calls. Whenever I try to explain how people from different countries dial in to a conference number to discuss something, I just get a blank look from them. Sigh.

Who else but only P&Gers use words like align, f-up and learnings? I'm guilty of this as well. More and more, I find myself getting "procterized." I invariably use P&G lingo in everyday conversation and end up earning a blank and/or confused look from the other person.

Most of the time thought, I just end up not mentioning anything specific to my work anymore to non-colleagues. I just concentrate on talking about other universally understood topics - you know, normal stuff like what city you last travelled in during your business trip, what food you tried, what airline you took or how long the waiting time like.

No wonder I keep seeing more and more P&G couples cropping up. Sometimes only fellow P&Gers can actually grasp what being in P&G actually means.

Sad but true.

I wonder: Is this just us or are other companies feeling the same thing?

An Extreme but Fun Weekend

Last weekend I would say I swung from two extremes. I watched "The Dark Knight" on Saturday and "High School Musical: The Ice Tour" the very next day.

One movie is so terrifyingly dark and eerie - it actually took me a week before I could recover and blog about it. I was being treated for shock the past week (kidding).

The other is so cheerfully perky - if the songs weren't that great, you would've love to slap them silly and tell them to grow up and join the rest of humanity.

I endured waiting in line for almost an hour to be able to get tickets for the last full show (5 hours waiting time in total)! But honestly, this is one of those movies that would be difficult to not watch. Not because of the controversy brought about by Heath's suicide, but because deep in our hearts, we know that this will be a very distinct and unique Batman movie compared to others. It would be a shame to miss and watch it.

I honestly didn't notice that the movie lasted 2.5 hours. I was so riveted by Heath's performance that I was surprised it was already 1:30am. My favorite scene was when Joker gave the two boats the choice to blow the other boat up. For me, that was a test of humanity. I was ready to believe in the worst about the people. I was pleasantly surprised at the scene's ending. I think I would need to watch it at least another time to be able to fully comprehend all of the themes that were used in the movie - greed, justice, survival, love, self-worth... the list seems endless. This is NOT the kind of movie I would normally want to watch, but I still have to say it's an excellent movie.

Fast forward 12 hours after. My family plus a bunch of family friends with their kids are all super excited to watch Troy and Gabriella sing and dance and ice skate.

Even though I'm nearly in my thirties, I find myself enjoying HSM immensely. I was clapping as hard and singing as loudly as the other kids seated beside me. I can't help it! They were singing my favorite songs from HSM1!!! Breaking Free, Start of Something New, What I've Been Looking For and a whole lot more. There will always be a little kid inside me, wanting to be peskily and eternally happy. Aside from the face that Troy had a receding hairline and one of his classmates had a huge bald patch, it was money well-spent.

All in all, a very extreme but fun weekend. Not bad.

Up, Up and Away

It was one of those lazy Sunday mornings. Ralph and I woke up together at around 8am.

We stretched. We yawned. We smiled sleepily and greeted each other good morning. I was too lazy to even think about what breakfast I needed to prepare for both of us.

Suddenly, I heard a very chirpy voice beside me exclaim, "Look, Mommy, it's pointing up."

Wide awake as well, I glanced down at what he was pointing at. And indeed, it is very much up, as up as any 7-year old thingies could be. Trying to be mature, I just nodded and wisely said nothing.

*pause*

Ralph followed it up with "Why is it up every morning, Mommy?"

Although generally I encourage Ralph to ask follow up questions for stuff that he doesn't understand, this is one of those moments wherein I regretting building that trait in him - just for a second at least.

I was struck speechless. My mind was filled with terror. Disaster, my brain screamed!

This is one of those few times I wished I weren't single and that I can just tell Ralph, "Go ask your dad." But alas, that's not how life is. (One of those other times was when I was teaching Ralph how to pee properly. Let me reassure you, it is now as instinctive as you would think it would be.)

I prayed for divine intervention. Maybe suddenly a tornado or hurricane would arrive for the first time in my hometown and swallow us alive. Maybe not.

I considered playing the old "distract-the-baby" game. I tried to think of what his favorite things are and how I can get his mind off this topic. All I came up with is blank.

I deliberated whether the old birds and bees stories include this part as well. *scratch that idea*

I thought of confusing him with too much scientific information, starting with "The male genitalia expands when the blood rushes into the..." and decided I couldn't pull it off.

All these thoughts happened within five seconds. (See how fast the mind works?)

I glanced over at Ralph, who was still waiting expectantly for my answer. I finally said, "I think it just means you need to pee first thing in the morning."

Ralph said, "OK," then went off to play.

Whew. Saved for at least a few more years.

US Trip 2008 Itinerary

This high level itinerary gives you a picture a what our 3-weeks vacation in US East Coast looked like. Don't ask me how we managed to get 3 weeks leave. It took a lot of planning for sure.

One thing I can say though: There's only so much you can control if you're travelling with a kid. My perfect detailed hour-by-hour schedule crumbled to pieces around the second week.

Mar 8: Arrival in Florida

Mar 9: Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure

Mar 10 – 13: Disneyworld (Animal Kingdom, Magic Kingdom, Epcot and Hollywood Studios)

Mar 13: Arrival in New Jersey

Mar 14: Long Island

Mar 15: Fire Island + Argyle Memorial Park + Lion King Musical

Mar 16: Philadelphia

Mar 17: @ home (Ralph got sick) + Laundry

Mar 18: The Phantom of the Opera Musical + M&M/ Hershey Store

Mar 19 – 20: @ home (Ralph got sick again)

Mar 21: Ground Zero + St. Patrick’s Cathedral + Sleepover at Tots with Patty

Mar 22: Outlet shopping

Mar 23: Atlantic City

Mar 24: Washington State Park + NYU + Dinner with Joey

Mar 25: New Jersey’s Children Museum

Mar 26: Central Park + Staten Island Ferry + Mamma Mia Musical

Mar 27: Laundry + Some shopping + Dinner @ Minado Restaurant

Mar 28: Last minute shopping

Mar 29 - 30: Somewhere in the sky

Mar 31: Back to reality

Stop Fighting, Please

It was a typical Saturday afternoon. All ten of us were squeezed inside an SUV on our way to the mall. Hannah was pinching Helene's arm. Helene tried to tell her older sister to stop but no avail. This went on for several hours. I mean minutes. It felt like hours.

Finally somebody said clearly and with conviction: "Both of you, please, don't fight anymore. You're sisters, for goodness' sake."

And if you're wondering, no, I didn't say this. Neither did my mom. I was too busy trying to keep the car from bumping into the car in front of us (which is another story). Mom was busy praying the rosary (kidding). These profound words of wisdom were actually uttered by my son, who is seven going on eighteen.

Miraculously, the fighting did stop. Everyone in the car was struck speechless. The kids by the absolute authority in their youngest cousin's voice. The adults by the sheer wisdom coming from somebody who hasn't memorized his multiplication table yet. What's more, I remember thinking, wow, this kid is darn polite.

Even at that young age, Ralph understood that blood is thicker than water. You don't get to choose your family the same way you pick out the car you want for your sixteenth birthday or what skirt to go with the outfit, but you are stuck with them for the rest of your life.

I remember several years back when my brother kicked somebody else's butt for teasing me and pulling my hair in school. His reasoning? He can tease me all he want, coz he's my older brother, but he'll be damned if some stranger does it to me. It is kind of twisted logic in a way, but sort of makes sense too, if you think about it.

I'm grateful that my 7-year old son has such an excellent grasp of the concept of family ties. Amidst his exasperating moments of alternating inattentiveness and chatterbox, at least I know that he will still visit me once a week in my retirement home forty years from now.

Landmark Forum in Calvin and Hobbes

I admit. I'm not exactly a huge fan of Calvin & Hobbes.

But I have to say, I was taken aback to receive an email containing this cartoon image from a fellow classmate of mine. It would be so cool if this was not mere coincidence.

Nevertheless, coincidence or not, I still think that C&H (and Landmark Forum) got it right - EVERYDAY is a day full of POSSIBILITIES!

I started out as a cynic, but at the end of the 3-day seminar, I am a believer. It literally saved my life.

ANYTHING you want for yourself, you can get it for yourself and for your loved ones!

Television vs. Girls

I've listen down the top 10 reasons why I think guys actually prefer television to girls for companionship. Not that I understand boys mind you, but I tried putting myself in their shoes, and this is what I (plus my overactive imagination) came up with.

Disclaimer: If it feels that I'm betraying womankind with this article, I swear I am not. Nor am I a girl-hating, techno-obsessive person either. I'm just trying to have fun with my pen. Honest.

1. Televisions are way much cheaper. The total costs include the initial investment when you actually purchase it, its contribution to the overall electricity bill and the occasional repair every 2 to 3 years. You don't have to shell out money on weekly dates. You don't have buy gifts and remember every monthsary or anniversary to commemorate the date of purchase.

2. Televisions offer variety. You don't have to listen to the same story of how her mom beat up her dad for the nth number of time over and over again. You're in the mood for blood and gore, go pick a war movie that's showing on HBO. If you're in the mood to laugh your head off, switch on the comedy channel. Whatever you want is just a click away.

3. You can turn the television on mute if you want peace and quiet. Heck, you can even completely turn it off if you want to.

4. Televisions are available 24 x 7. They don't get tired. They don't need rest. They don't need to be coaxed out of giving a repeat performance.

5. You can always trade in your television once they are obsolete. Upgrade one, upgrade all. You don't have to rely on the half-new, half-old model that you bought some five years back.

6. Televisions are just there all day long. You don't have to think of new places to take them to. You don't have to worry that they'll be bored with doing the same routine every week. You don't have to change your bedroom techniques just to make sure your partner is not bored. They're just... there all the time.

7. Televisions come in all sizes and packages. Big or small. Japanese or German. Flat or not. Colored or black and white. Just provide the specs and voila!

8. Televisions don't need perfect manners or grooming. You don't have to shave and dress up in your best Sunday clothes to watch your favorite TV. You don't even have to pretend that you like the hors devour that you ordered in that ridiculously expensive restaurant that your girlfriend wanted to go to. You can even curse every other person on earth while you're watching and they wouldn't cringe. You can just slob around all day in your pj's, eat chips and drink beer while watching ESPN all day long.

9. Televisions won't force you to meet their manufacturer parents or their production batch mates. You don't need to engage in any awkward "Is this guy good enough for my daughter?" moments. You don't need to answer questions of how much you earn and when you plan to marry their daughter. Televisions are the perfect loner partners.

10. Televisions are not naturally insecure. You do not need to reassure them that their clothes are not too tight nor their zits are too obvious. You don't even have to be extra caring and understanding when girls are PMS-ing. In fact, you don't even have to have any reaction at all in front of the tube. That's how secure TVs are.

But then again, televisions don't offer the same zest and warmth that you get out of finding your soul mate, your one true love either. They cannot comfort you when you just received news that your dad is critically ill or when your child just said that he hates you and never wants to talk to you again for the rest of his life. They also do not warm your bed nor do they offer hugs and kisses just because they are happy to see you.

So, guys, which would you choose? Televisions or girls? :)

No Priest Is Tone Deaf

Maybe I'm just lucky, but at least, from my experience, I haven't heard any priest who's tone deaf yet.

Weird accents, yes. Boring sermons, definitely yes. But when they actually sing words of God, their voice comes across as pure and strong.

This works really well with me because I love to sing. I think that singing is one of the best ways to communicate. Hearing mass is okay. Saying your responses after the priest is also okay. But when I sing in harmony with the choir, the priest and the whole congregation, it just hits me right where it counts. I feel closer to humanity and to God. I feel more open and self-expressive. And I feel like at that moment that you open your mouth and belt out the first few notes of a worship song, it just feels so darn good.

Those of you whom I'm personally acquainted with know that I've recently re-discovered my Catholic faith. After more than 10 years of spiritual confusion and eventually complete withdrawal, I've started once again to look for my spiritual side - the one that believes that good triumphs over evil and that good guys do not finish last.

I've been roaming around neighboring towns and cities, looking for the church that I feel like I would belong in. I also tried different schedules - at un-"godly" hours of 7 in the morning or even as late as 6 in the evening. Thus, I've came across quite a few priests for the past four weeks or so.

Some are native Filipinos, while some are clearly imported from Mainland China. Some have a wacky sense of humor that reminds you of a religious Jay Leno, while others seem to have none at all. Some look positively angelic, while some actually look like they're just dressing up as priests because they look like they have this constant mischievous thoughts on their minds.

But regardless of the differences, I surprisingly found something common in all of them. They have different voices when they preach the Gospel. But when they sing, assuming that they do not have colds at that time, every single one of their voices come out solid and forceful.

Now I don't claim to have seen and heard all priests all over the world, but so far, I haven't encountered any priest yet who can't carry a tune... Well, at least during Mass that is. I'm not sure how they'll fare at a karaoke bar, but definitely, inside the house of God, they'll be able to join Amreican Idol and not be laughed at.

I wonder: Is this one of the unwritten requirements of becoming a priest? Just kidding.

Bittersweet

When your childhood friend is pregnant and will become a mother in 7 months' time... When your little sister strikes new friendship with other people... When your best friend initiates a romantic relationship with somebody he had really liked for a long time... When your 7-year old son gains new playmates who understands techno lingo and gets higher Nintendo and WII scores than you...

When these things happened, I knew precisely in that millisecond that things will never be the same between us. The people that you have loved and nurtured have suddenly matured and found courage to spread their wings out in the big bad world out there.

All you are left with is a sense of bittersweet happiness, a feeling of foolish pride and hundreds of fervent prayers of hope and best wishes.

That their bold leap of faith into life may bring them more happiness and completeness they could have ever hoped for beyond the safe and perfect little world that both of you have created and lived in for the past years.

That they may still remember and not forgo several years of bonding just for the sake of new ones.

That despite leading a life separate and distinct from you, they may continue to invite you to share in the next chapter of their lives together.

At the end of the day, although it does feel like it sometimes, I realized that I never really lost them. They weren't mine to selfishly keep and hold on to. I just lent them to other people equally deserving of their affection. Thus, this will hopefully expand the circle of relationship that I currently have.

This time, I will learn to love not just my childhood friend, but even her new husband and soon-to-be son or daughter. I will learn to watch movies and have dinner not just with my best friend, but even with his girlfriend-to-be. I will learn to appreciate not just my little sister who is not so little anymore, but even the new great set of friends that she gets along with very well. I might even learn more tips and tricks on conquering Nintendo and WII games from other kids who are around my son's age. Who knows? Anything is possible.

All in all, it's not a bad deal. In fact, it's a pretty darn good deal.

I just have to get used to this mode of thinking. That's all.

If I Had A Pet Turtle...

If I had another pet turtle, I would name him/her/it "Reeky" (pronounced as Riiiicky as in Ricky Martin).

I had 2 pet turtles back in college (millions of years away). One was named Smelly, the other one Stinky. I know it's not usual for young girls to choose turtles for pets, but I think they are loads of fun. At least more fun (and less troublesome) than the usual choices of cats or dogs or birds.

I remembered playing Peek-A-Boo with them, although they only know how to peek and I only know how to boo. Our other favorite game was Spin-A-Wheel, or in this case, Spin-A-Shell. I also loved to tickle them, esp. when they're on their back shells and their arms and legs are all flailing sideways. It's just too cute for words.

On the practical side, I also remembered that they weren't high-maintenance at all. I don't need to feed them too much food. Plus when they actually poop (though I haven't actually seen them do that yet), I don't have to wipe their butt. I just need to remember to change the water and throw in some turtle food once in a while.

Alas, despite my pet turtles having excellent entertainment value, it still wasn't enough to sustain a nineteen-year-old girl's attention.

As with any hardworking college student during finals week, I crammed and studied until my eyes popped out of the sockets. Unfortunately, while I studied, I forgot to feed and change Smelly's water. After finals week, I suddenly remembered my dear pet turtle #1 Smelly. But it was too late. Smelly dried up. I had nightmares for days afterwards. Till now, I still remember what a dried up used-to-be-cute turtle looks like. Poor Smelly!

I emphatically told my parents that I won't ever have children ever. I can't even take care of a pet turtle. How can God trust a human being with me?

The solution? My overprotective (and generous) parents brought me another pet turtle. I was a bit unsure of my parenting abilities, but eventually, I was having another close and fun relationship with pet turtle #2 - Stinky. I learned my lesson. I changed his/her/its water regularly. To make sure he/she/it doesn't die of starvation, I kept feeding him meal after meal... Sigh, after a couple of weeks, Stinky died of gluttony and obesity. Imagine how horrible I felt when Stinky died. I told my parents, no more pets, no more children, no nothing.

After 10 years (oops you guessed my age now ), I finally decided I'm all grown up. I can handle pet turtle #3. I'm looking forward to having Reeky within the next few days. Hopefully, he'll live a longer life this time. Or else I'll really be traumatized for life.

P.S. I'll post some pictures

once I bring Reeky home.