Anti-Stalking 101

What is the difference between a guy who is stalking you vs a guy who's crazy in love with you?

For me, clinical deeply-rooted psychological issues aside, the thin line is really YOU. Your assessment of his actions depend a lot on how attracted you are to the other guy.

Think about it.

If you fall asleep with thoughts of him on your mind, you wouldn't mind that he texts you sweet-nothings every 5 minutes. In fact, you would actually be feeling quite giddy and your feet would've been floating in heaven already by the third (no, the first) text. Never would it even enter your head that he could be stalker material.

On the other hand, if another guy whom you obviously cannot imagine ever going out with starts doing the same thing, you would probably warn your family and friends that this guy is psycho (with matching circling actions near your temple). You would have a similar reaction if that same guy that you were so crazy about a week before suddenly looked horrible to you, and you broke up with him, but he’s still doing the same things that he used to do before. What was previously sweet and mushy now seemed annoying and sometimes, downright threatening.

Have I convinced you yet?

Actually to tell you the truth, my theory MIGHT hold true for some cases, but it only covers the tip of the iceberg. Even if we take out the YOU factor, there's still the bigger part of the puzzle that's missing - the psychological mindset of the stalker in question.

I have given up trying to analyze these types of people. They can probably come up with a dozen people to blame for their behaviors (all the way from their siblings and parents to their great-great-grandparents), but at the end of the day, they allow themselves to be victims of whatever circumstances they were caught in. They prefer to dwell and fixate on a certain object (in this case, unfortunately, that happened to be you), rather than stand and face whatever rejections or humiliations reality throws back at them.

What do you do when this happens? What do you do when some lunatic decides that you are "The Only One" for him.

Honestly, no matter how much you read on this or prepare yourself to be excellent judges of character for "potential stalkers," this is just one of those things that you cannot fully prepare for.

However, I do know that there are some DON'Ts that you should be aware of.
1. Do not keep this to yourself. Tell your friends and family about this. You are not paranoid. (At least I hope you're not.)
2. Do not prolong any situation wherein you are alone with this stalker. Of course, the ideal situation is that you never end up alone with him/her. But based from experience, these types are typically more creative than average guys. Don't worry about sounding uncouth or losing your poise. Just get the hell away from him.
3. Do not feel sorry for him. He is a master in emotional blackmail and guilt trips. Do not fall for those tricks.

In case you were wondering but are too polite to ask: Yes, I am speaking from personal experience. The only difference is that I was too young and gullible then. (Now I'm older but still gullible). Hehe.

I sincerely hope that you won't ever need this particular list. But if you do happen to be in one of these situations, remember that you are not alone.

A lot have had encountered this horrible experience and have survived it. You may not remember what I wrote above, but you just have to believe in yourself. You ARE strong enough to overcome this. (And it doesn't hurt to have half a dozen muscled guys playing your bodyguards while you recover from this ordeal LOL.)