The Test

I realize I am a novice when it comes to dating. Plus, I am also a hopeless romantic, having grown up reading romance novels. (I blame Judith McNaught, Linda Howard and Sandra Brown for putting crazy ideas in my head.)

But still, rookie or not, I do know for a fact that guys normally put on their best foot forward during the initial courting stage (although I happen to know a couple of guys who insist on acting as they normally would even while courting).

Needless to say, most girls are actually surprised, disappointed, disillusioned or all of the above, when the courting stage ends and reality sets in. The guy they knew who was romantic, sweet and aggressive in pursuing them evolves into … well… typical guys. It is only now that we girls, realize that they are actually lazy idiots who are content to just sit around and play video games all day (and night) long... Okay, maybe I’m being too harsh, but I think you know what I mean.

This is why – to save womenfolk a lot of heartaches in the future – I am proposing that all practical, modern women out there, that they should insist on experiencing these 6 scenarios to begin with, before you even consider saying yes. Remember, we have to suffer for the rest of our lives if we say yes to the wrong persons. So it’s always better to be safe than sorry.

I have a fairly simple and straightforward rating system:
Boot him out means he fails the test. Better open the door and kick him out before he breaks your heart.
So-so means he passed and has met expectations. He is definitely one of the good guys. Continue dating and getting to know him until he can be promoted to the next level.
Marry him means hold on tight and marry him. He is “The One.”

Okay, here is my tentative list. Of course, I’ll probably be adding or deleting some as my dating experiences grow and/or if personal circumstances disprove otherwise.

1. Going shopping together

Boot him out: He absolutely refuses to go shopping with you. He’d rather spend his time watching porn or reading FHM. Or if he does agree to go shopping, he whines and frowns the whole time.
So-so: He agrees to go with you, even during mall-wide sales. He carries your shopping bags and patiently waits for you to choose between a pair of green-blue vs blue-green shoes.
Marry him: He agrees to go with you, carries your shopping bags and patiently waits for you to choose between a pair of green-blue vs blue-green shoes… But he does all of these not just in malls, but even in stuffy, dirty wet markets like 168 or Tutuban.

(Note: 168 and Tutuban are famous wet-market type of shopping areas in Manila, Philippines that are known equally for their cheap prices that you can further haggle on AND not-so-nice ambiance – unless you don't mind 50 other shoppers elbowing you while you look at the goods; dirty and somewhat smelly streets; and the possibility of being robbed and not noticing it until you're about to reach for your wallet to pay for something... But to be fair, it does offer good bargains... that's why it's still irresistible to us women!)

2. Being sick and/or having your period

Boot him out: He says, “Text me when your period is over so we can uhh... you know ... hang out again” or “Call me when your bug is not contagious anymore.”
So-so: He asks you where you’re feeling sick and how he can help. He offers to accompany you to the doctor.
Marry him: He feeds you soup and crackers till you’re back to your old self. He buys your napkins and doesn’t consider it embarrassing. He keeps Advil in his pocket, just in case you happen to need it.

3. Meeting your family

Boot him out: He fidgets and gives excuses every time the subject of meeting your parents.
So-so: He readily agrees to meet up with your family and even puts up with your dad’s inquisitions.
Marry him: He wants to meet even the grandparents AND aunties/uncles/cousins. He plans the whole thing from start to end.

4. Going on a trip together

Boot him out: He looks at you blankly and wonders, “Why do we need to take a trip? We’re having fun eating at McDonald’s right?” He dodges and squirms until you finally give up asking him. He heaves a huge sigh of relief when you finally stop asking him.
So-so: His reply: “Sure, where do you want to go? I think I have a couple of unused vacation leaves around May.”
Marry him: He has half a dozen travel brochures in his bag and is just waiting for you to align your vacation leaves with your boss and give the magic word. He refuses your attempt to even pay for anything and wants you to leave the trip’s itinerary to him. You have this strong feeling that he's about to propose to you during this trip.

5. Having a bad hair/skin day

Boot him out: He takes one look at you and says, “I think somebody is having a bad hair/skin day today.”
So-so: He puts his arms around you and says, “Don’t worry honey, you still look beautiful to me.”
Marry him: As soon as you meet, he kisses you passionately, pimples and hair frizzing and all.

6. Celebrating your birthday

Boot him out: He forgets.
So-so: He insists on taking you out to dinner. He buys you that stuff toy/book/shirt/bag that you’ve been eyeing for the past 2 weeks.
Marry him: He connives with your friends and family to plan a surprise party for you.

Six situations that will tell you how much your guy is willing to do for you just because you like doing those girly stuffs.
Six settings that will prove how flexible he will be when it comes to tough situation - even those that he is not in complete control of.
Six venues that will show his true-er colors, so much more than an ordinary dinner/movie date can.

Of course, I'm not saying that these are the "end all, be all" of finding Mr. Right. But if he fails in majority of them, then it's probably a strong signal that you need to re-evaluate how much into you your guy really is.

Disclaimer: Author’s viewpoint does not guarantee 100% success rate nor does she attempt to generalize all women and men into specific boxes. These observations are merely based from personal experiences and stories from fellow modern, practical girlfriends.