Scenario 1
I ride a taxi going to mall. (For some reason, the car was not available.)
Upon reaching destination, the taxi driver stops.
Meter reads 85 pesos.
I pay 100, expecting a change of 15.
Taxi driver returns 10.
I ask why.
Taxi driver tells me I'm stingy.
I say I don't care.
Taxi driver tells me I'm stingy again.
I say I don't care again.
I still want my 5 bucks.
I wait.
After 5 minutes, taxi driver returns the money and speeds away in a huff.
Scenario 2
I see something I like in a wet market.
I ask the vendor how much it is.
She says 300.
I ask for 100.
She says 200.
I say 100.
She says 150.
I say 100.
She says 120.
I say 100.
She throws her hands up in exasperation and says it's only 20 pesos.
I still say 100.
I walk away.
She curses and mutters something about stingy people shouldn't live long.
Scenario 3
Mom asks for house tea or service tea.
Waiter brings it over.
Whole family eats breakfast.
Whole family (except me) drinks tea.
Whole family is full and happy.
Bill arrives.
I ask waiter why there is a charge of 30 pesos for the house tea.
Waiter says the restaurant does not have house tea.
Waiter also says he apologizes for the inconvenience.
I started saying it's fine.
But Waiter #2 at the side mutters it's just 30 pesos.
My eyebrows shot up.
I turn to the waiter and use my haughtiest tone and told him that it is not about the money. We will pay 30 pesos. But people should be transparent about the charges. If we ask for house tea and there's no house tea, you should say that. So that nobody will be surprised.
Waiter #2 keeps quiet but you know that he still feels that he's right.
We pay the bill, including the 30 pesos for the tea but NO tip.
***
I could go on and on. It's not just limited to these folks.
On a really, really good day, I feel generous and just proactively tell them to round up the amount due. Especially if the driver doesn't demand for a round up, I want to do it all the more. Sort of like reverse psychology.
On a normal so-so day, I'll probably just shrug it off and say that at least I'm helping somebody in need. He or she probably needs it more than I do.
However on a really bad day, my blood pressure shoots up the roof and I end up arguing over a few measly bucks.
What is it about these people? They seem to think that people who are not poor should be as free-giving as the poor. Don't they know that we also have to tighten our belts and do budgeting as any other people?
Compared to US dollars, I suppose that the peso value is so low that 5 or 10 bucks is hardly worth anything. I wonder if this is the reason why they think that short-changing us wouldn't matter as much?
There is somehow an inappropriate sense of right to charity as far as they are concerned. Sort of like a double standards of rich vs poor. That somehow, if we ask for the exact change, we are considered stingy (or called worse behind our backs, I'm sure). But if you reverse the roles, if we return 99 pesos and miss out paying back just 1 peso, we would also be called a theif or worse.
I really don't get it.
Sunday, September 2, 2007
On Being Funny
Aside from being an exceptionally bright student as well as being involved in many school extra-curricular activities, my 6-year old son has a sense of humor that can rival any stand-up comedian. Interestingly enough, the funniest stuff that comes out of his mouth is when he actually did NOT mean to be funny.
Being the obsessive-compulsive parent that I am, I was able to capture some in writing. Enjoy reading!
On silent men (3 years old)
Ralph: Why does Daddy make grunting sounds whenever he talks to us? Doesn't he know how to speak English?
On shapes (4 years old)
Mommy Hailyn: Do you know the difference between oval and round?
Ralph: Yes. Mommy's face is oval and Daddy's face is round.
On firetrucks (4 years old)
Ralph: Why are firetrucks called firetrucks? Their trucks don't have fires in them.
On colleges (5 years old)
Uncle Heustein: Does anybody know where A-ma (grandmother) studied college?
Ralph: I do, I do. It's in UE.
Uncle Heustein: What does UE stand for?
Ralph: University of the ... Earth?
On music and lyrics (6 years old)
Mommy Hailyn: In the High School musical CD that's playing right now, we have some songs that are minus-one.
Ralph: What does that mean?
Mommy Hailyn: It means that they're same as regular songs but they don't have anybody singing in them.
Ralph: Oh, you mean minus-one-thing.
Mommy Hailyn: Err... right. (That sort of made sense.)
Yep, my son is a riot. Good thing he also does well in school or else I'll have to accept the fact that he'll earn his keep by cracking jokes in comedy clubs 10 years from now.
I'm still looking forward to more quips and jokes in the years to come.
Being the obsessive-compulsive parent that I am, I was able to capture some in writing. Enjoy reading!
On silent men (3 years old)
Ralph: Why does Daddy make grunting sounds whenever he talks to us? Doesn't he know how to speak English?
On shapes (4 years old)
Mommy Hailyn: Do you know the difference between oval and round?
Ralph: Yes. Mommy's face is oval and Daddy's face is round.
On firetrucks (4 years old)
Ralph: Why are firetrucks called firetrucks? Their trucks don't have fires in them.
On colleges (5 years old)
Uncle Heustein: Does anybody know where A-ma (grandmother) studied college?
Ralph: I do, I do. It's in UE.
Uncle Heustein: What does UE stand for?
Ralph: University of the ... Earth?
On music and lyrics (6 years old)
Mommy Hailyn: In the High School musical CD that's playing right now, we have some songs that are minus-one.
Ralph: What does that mean?
Mommy Hailyn: It means that they're same as regular songs but they don't have anybody singing in them.
Ralph: Oh, you mean minus-one-thing.
Mommy Hailyn: Err... right. (That sort of made sense.)
Yep, my son is a riot. Good thing he also does well in school or else I'll have to accept the fact that he'll earn his keep by cracking jokes in comedy clubs 10 years from now.
I'm still looking forward to more quips and jokes in the years to come.
Saturday, September 1, 2007
Song of the Month - September 2007
She's Out Of My Life
by Josh Groban
She's out of my life
She's out of my life
And I don't know whether to laugh or cry
I don't know whether to live or die
And it cuts like a knife
She's out of my life
It's out of my hands
It's out of my hands
To think for two years she was here
And I took her for granted I was so cavalier
Now the way that It stands
She's out of my hands
So I've learned that love's not possession
And I've learned that love won't wait
Now I've learned that love needs expression
But I learned too late
She's out of my life
She's out of my life
Damned indecision and cursed pride
Kept my love for her locked deep Inside
And it cuts like a knife
She's out of my life
by Josh Groban
She's out of my life
She's out of my life
And I don't know whether to laugh or cry
I don't know whether to live or die
And it cuts like a knife
She's out of my life
It's out of my hands
It's out of my hands
To think for two years she was here
And I took her for granted I was so cavalier
Now the way that It stands
She's out of my hands
So I've learned that love's not possession
And I've learned that love won't wait
Now I've learned that love needs expression
But I learned too late
She's out of my life
She's out of my life
Damned indecision and cursed pride
Kept my love for her locked deep Inside
And it cuts like a knife
She's out of my life
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Liar, Liar
All writers are liars.
*pause*
Okay, that might be too harsh. Or too abrupt. Let me try to explain what I mean. I think you'll be nodding your heads after you read this.
By law (my own law), writers are the creative sort. This means that they have a very hyperactive imagination. Give them a carrot and they can already see the garden full of fresh vegetables and orchids. Give them flowers and they start thinking how many kids you'll have and what their names will be.
By another law (still my own), writers are entertainers. They have this NEED to keep people un-bored. They need to keep them on their toes, whether at a party or using their pens.
By yet another law (yes, still my own, sorry. yes I really love myself.), writers know a lot of little facts and tidbits, things that are interesting enough to be talked about, but not that readily available such that it is common knowledge.
Combining all three laws makes a perfect formula for lying.
We (yes I'm included in those whose pants will catch fire) have a tendency to exaggerate... to stretch the truth a bit... to make black look grey and white look silver. We have the gift of gab. We try to make unexciting things exciting, even when we feel guilty for adding a new angle to the story.
Yes, I am one of them too. In fact, I actually felt bad every so often when I think about it.
This is why I got so relieved when I read Robert Fulghum's introduction in his book "All I Really Need to Know I Learned In Kindergarten." I love this book. I love it not only for providing good insights in its simplicity, but also because Robert was a kindred soul. He was able to sum up why writers are liars. Well, he didn't exactly say that, but he did say that he added and subtracted a bit here and there when he was editing his book.
After reading those two simple sentences, I heaved a huge sigh of relief. I am not going to hell after all. I mean, I'm basically a nice person and I hate seeing people get hurt over nothing but I just can't help trying to entertain folks. And if this means augmenting another angle here and there to make the story more interesting, then why not? Robert's words actually make me weep with relief. (Yep, that's another example of me being a liar.) But seriously, I did feel better when I read his words. It's like, "Yes, finally! Somebody understands what I'm going through... and he's actually able to articulate it in two simple sentences."
Long live, Robert Fulghum.
See? I was right. You are nodding your heads as you read this. Of course, you do know that it does take one to know one right? Hehe... Gotcha!
*pause*
Okay, that might be too harsh. Or too abrupt. Let me try to explain what I mean. I think you'll be nodding your heads after you read this.
By law (my own law), writers are the creative sort. This means that they have a very hyperactive imagination. Give them a carrot and they can already see the garden full of fresh vegetables and orchids. Give them flowers and they start thinking how many kids you'll have and what their names will be.
By another law (still my own), writers are entertainers. They have this NEED to keep people un-bored. They need to keep them on their toes, whether at a party or using their pens.
By yet another law (yes, still my own, sorry. yes I really love myself.), writers know a lot of little facts and tidbits, things that are interesting enough to be talked about, but not that readily available such that it is common knowledge.
Combining all three laws makes a perfect formula for lying.
We (yes I'm included in those whose pants will catch fire) have a tendency to exaggerate... to stretch the truth a bit... to make black look grey and white look silver. We have the gift of gab. We try to make unexciting things exciting, even when we feel guilty for adding a new angle to the story.
Yes, I am one of them too. In fact, I actually felt bad every so often when I think about it.
This is why I got so relieved when I read Robert Fulghum's introduction in his book "All I Really Need to Know I Learned In Kindergarten." I love this book. I love it not only for providing good insights in its simplicity, but also because Robert was a kindred soul. He was able to sum up why writers are liars. Well, he didn't exactly say that, but he did say that he added and subtracted a bit here and there when he was editing his book.
"I am a writer. I am not an investigative journalist."
After reading those two simple sentences, I heaved a huge sigh of relief. I am not going to hell after all. I mean, I'm basically a nice person and I hate seeing people get hurt over nothing but I just can't help trying to entertain folks. And if this means augmenting another angle here and there to make the story more interesting, then why not? Robert's words actually make me weep with relief. (Yep, that's another example of me being a liar.) But seriously, I did feel better when I read his words. It's like, "Yes, finally! Somebody understands what I'm going through... and he's actually able to articulate it in two simple sentences."
Long live, Robert Fulghum.
See? I was right. You are nodding your heads as you read this. Of course, you do know that it does take one to know one right? Hehe... Gotcha!
Sense and Sensibility
I had been experiencing blurred vision sporadically for the past few weeks. I thought it was because of stress, so I just shrugged it off. But when it still came and went after I was able to take some time off from work, I wondered it if was more serious that I originally assumed.
I quickly made an appointment with my eye doctor. As it turns out, after 3 years from my Lasik eye surgery, I started to get astigmatism in my left eye. Interestingly enough, my doctor informs me, rather snottily I might add, that among his hundreds of patients, I am part of the minority 2% who actually had some imperfect vision before the 5-year guarantee was up.
Yup, even lasik surgery has warranty. Funny, isn't it? In this case, I was rather relieved, because I couldn't imagine paying a king's ransom the second time around just to correct this 75 degree astigmatism. But then again, I couldn't imagine needing to wear glasses again either. Either way, I just want to kiss whoever came up with the idea of warranty for eye surgery.
Conclusion was that I needed a touch-up surgery. And because I'm still inside the warranty period (I feel like an appliance), I can get that enhancement surgery for free. I will aim to complete that touch-up within September. (Yes of year 2007). Although I have to wear this huge and ugly goggles for at least 7 days, I feel like I should still celebrate. I think this is the only time I have actually had use for warranties. I always thought that they were just money-making schemes. Guess I am wrong.
I think the easiest for me to give up is really the sense of smell. On the other hand, I would definitely go crazy if I had to lose my eyesight.
I cannot imagine not seeing the different colors of the sunset nor your firstborn's smile. Not being able to read a book on how Jay Leno felt on his first audition or what Harry Potter's first kiss felt like. Not knowing what ecru or fuschia or aqua blue looks like. I can go on and on, but you get my drift.
On the other hand, I can imagine myself not being able smell at all. This is especially helpful when working overtime in the office and the washroom opposite you stinks like crazy. Or when you're plastered next to a bus full of sweaty people at the end of a long work day. Or being near your 6-year old son who finds it funny to fart whenever your face is near his body.
Of course, I don't want to think nor imagine that I would actually lose something a few years from now. But you have to admit it's an interesting thought to have while listening in to 20 people with different accents arguing about whether to turn on a new SAP functionality or not. (Don't ask for details. All you have to know that I am in the middle of the a late-night meeting while doing this. Sssh.)
Disclaimer: I don't want to jinx myself nor do I want to be presumptious and belittle everyone who has lost one sense or the other. This is just my personal opinion. This is just me being my morbid self. Hehe.
I quickly made an appointment with my eye doctor. As it turns out, after 3 years from my Lasik eye surgery, I started to get astigmatism in my left eye. Interestingly enough, my doctor informs me, rather snottily I might add, that among his hundreds of patients, I am part of the minority 2% who actually had some imperfect vision before the 5-year guarantee was up.
Yup, even lasik surgery has warranty. Funny, isn't it? In this case, I was rather relieved, because I couldn't imagine paying a king's ransom the second time around just to correct this 75 degree astigmatism. But then again, I couldn't imagine needing to wear glasses again either. Either way, I just want to kiss whoever came up with the idea of warranty for eye surgery.
Conclusion was that I needed a touch-up surgery. And because I'm still inside the warranty period (I feel like an appliance), I can get that enhancement surgery for free. I will aim to complete that touch-up within September. (Yes of year 2007). Although I have to wear this huge and ugly goggles for at least 7 days, I feel like I should still celebrate. I think this is the only time I have actually had use for warranties. I always thought that they were just money-making schemes. Guess I am wrong.
***
And since I'm such a morbid person, this got me to thinking -- among all of my five senses (unfortunately this does not include common sense or sense of humor), which among them would I be first and last to give up?
I think the easiest for me to give up is really the sense of smell. On the other hand, I would definitely go crazy if I had to lose my eyesight.
I cannot imagine not seeing the different colors of the sunset nor your firstborn's smile. Not being able to read a book on how Jay Leno felt on his first audition or what Harry Potter's first kiss felt like. Not knowing what ecru or fuschia or aqua blue looks like. I can go on and on, but you get my drift.
On the other hand, I can imagine myself not being able smell at all. This is especially helpful when working overtime in the office and the washroom opposite you stinks like crazy. Or when you're plastered next to a bus full of sweaty people at the end of a long work day. Or being near your 6-year old son who finds it funny to fart whenever your face is near his body.
Of course, I don't want to think nor imagine that I would actually lose something a few years from now. But you have to admit it's an interesting thought to have while listening in to 20 people with different accents arguing about whether to turn on a new SAP functionality or not. (Don't ask for details. All you have to know that I am in the middle of the a late-night meeting while doing this. Sssh.)
Disclaimer: I don't want to jinx myself nor do I want to be presumptious and belittle everyone who has lost one sense or the other. This is just my personal opinion. This is just me being my morbid self. Hehe.
Boys Will Be Boys
Whether they are toddlers or past their prime, boys will definitely still be boys.
Fortunately AND unfortunately, my 6-year old son is no exception.
They are fascinated with action figures. Mask Rider, Power Rangers, Transformers, Justice League, Pokemon. You name it. As long as they have special powers and they fight, my son knows each and every character intimately.
They try kiss you on the mouth. Out of the blue, my son would give me a smack right on the lips even though I was obviously asking him for a kiss on my cheek. Of course, he has enough insight to know that this can only be done unexpectedly so that it will still be cute and amusing vs being just plain annoying. Smart kid, my son.
They stare at a girl's breast. I was kneeling down and tying my son's shoelace. Then he tells me, "Mom, I can see your nipples." I just said calmly, "Those are not my nipples, baby. That's just my breasts." Then he grins mischievously. *Shudder* I can't wait for the day he asks me about the birds and the bees. Whoopee.
They like touching themselves. They can't help it. Heck, my son can't help it and he's six! I swear I've never seen him soooo happy as when his hands discovered his genitalia... not even when he received his Christmas or birthday gifts. Of course, being the cool mom that I am, I didn't make a big deal out of it. I just ignored it till he got tired and slept. (I did take a picture so that I can use it for bribery IF he tries to do something really evil.)
They don't want their mothers to show any skin at all. No matter how much boys like looking at bare torsos and ample cleavage, they still want their own mothers (or sisters or aunts) to be covered from head to toe. I once wore a form-fitting baby tee that kept riding up whenever I walk. My son kept tugging it back. One other time, he even asked if I forgot to wear my jacket. That was when I tried to be daring and wore a dress that shows some cleavage, however imaginary it may be.
Sigh. I should be thankful. Really I am. Honest.
It could be worse I suppose. He could have an endless fascination for dolls or be all brawn and no brains.
Fortunately AND unfortunately, my 6-year old son is no exception.
They are fascinated with action figures. Mask Rider, Power Rangers, Transformers, Justice League, Pokemon. You name it. As long as they have special powers and they fight, my son knows each and every character intimately.
They try kiss you on the mouth. Out of the blue, my son would give me a smack right on the lips even though I was obviously asking him for a kiss on my cheek. Of course, he has enough insight to know that this can only be done unexpectedly so that it will still be cute and amusing vs being just plain annoying. Smart kid, my son.
They stare at a girl's breast. I was kneeling down and tying my son's shoelace. Then he tells me, "Mom, I can see your nipples." I just said calmly, "Those are not my nipples, baby. That's just my breasts." Then he grins mischievously. *Shudder* I can't wait for the day he asks me about the birds and the bees. Whoopee.
They like touching themselves. They can't help it. Heck, my son can't help it and he's six! I swear I've never seen him soooo happy as when his hands discovered his genitalia... not even when he received his Christmas or birthday gifts. Of course, being the cool mom that I am, I didn't make a big deal out of it. I just ignored it till he got tired and slept. (I did take a picture so that I can use it for bribery IF he tries to do something really evil.)
They don't want their mothers to show any skin at all. No matter how much boys like looking at bare torsos and ample cleavage, they still want their own mothers (or sisters or aunts) to be covered from head to toe. I once wore a form-fitting baby tee that kept riding up whenever I walk. My son kept tugging it back. One other time, he even asked if I forgot to wear my jacket. That was when I tried to be daring and wore a dress that shows some cleavage, however imaginary it may be.
Sigh. I should be thankful. Really I am. Honest.
It could be worse I suppose. He could have an endless fascination for dolls or be all brawn and no brains.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
FAQs on Title-Making
I don't know about you but I've always been fascinated with the title of a story as much as I devour the actual story itself. In most cases, the title is the make-or-break deal for me - I would assume that the rest of the story would be as boring as its title. On the other hand, I would be more than inclined to buy a book that has an interesting or eye-catching title.
Over the years, I've had people ask me how I come up with the header, subject, title, or whatever you wish to call it. Normally I just shrug my shoulders and give a mysterious smile. But people are more persistent nowadays, hence they won't accept a smile for an answer. Therefore I'm forced to come up with specific answers.
When do you come up with the title?
I loathe to give this answer, but in this case, it's true. It really depends. Sometimes, before I start writing, I already know what I want the title to be. Sometimes, it just pops out while I'm writing the middle paragraph. Other times, I have to rewrite the title at the end of my article because the story suddenly develops into a different plot by itself and the original title doesn't seem to fit that well.
But in my case, since I only write stuff that I am either passionate about or interested in, it is really not difficult for me to come up with one. In fact, i can safely say I have never finished an article without knowing what the title would be. That's actually the easiest part for me.
What are the different ways of naming the title?
If I were to categorize my titles, it falls into either of these 3 categories.
a) Alliterations
b) Puns - This is when I'm trying to be cute :)
c) Straightforward, matter-of-fact - like the title above
I find that using any of the 3 or a combination of them usually works for me.
How do you know that you have the right title?
It's instinctive. You just know. If you have doubts, maybe you can do better or maybe you just have too high standards.
Those answers should be more satisfactory more than a smile right?
Disclaimer: These are the author's personal views. You can agree with them, or agree to disagree. They work for me. Who knows, might work for you too. Feel free to email or add your thoughts.
Over the years, I've had people ask me how I come up with the header, subject, title, or whatever you wish to call it. Normally I just shrug my shoulders and give a mysterious smile. But people are more persistent nowadays, hence they won't accept a smile for an answer. Therefore I'm forced to come up with specific answers.
When do you come up with the title?
I loathe to give this answer, but in this case, it's true. It really depends. Sometimes, before I start writing, I already know what I want the title to be. Sometimes, it just pops out while I'm writing the middle paragraph. Other times, I have to rewrite the title at the end of my article because the story suddenly develops into a different plot by itself and the original title doesn't seem to fit that well.
But in my case, since I only write stuff that I am either passionate about or interested in, it is really not difficult for me to come up with one. In fact, i can safely say I have never finished an article without knowing what the title would be. That's actually the easiest part for me.
What are the different ways of naming the title?
If I were to categorize my titles, it falls into either of these 3 categories.
a) Alliterations
b) Puns - This is when I'm trying to be cute :)
c) Straightforward, matter-of-fact - like the title above
I find that using any of the 3 or a combination of them usually works for me.
How do you know that you have the right title?
It's instinctive. You just know. If you have doubts, maybe you can do better or maybe you just have too high standards.
Those answers should be more satisfactory more than a smile right?
Disclaimer: These are the author's personal views. You can agree with them, or agree to disagree. They work for me. Who knows, might work for you too. Feel free to email or add your thoughts.
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Crash and Burn
I pride myself on being able to take on more work than a typical woker and still deliver excellent results. Over the years, I have learned to have the insight on when I have extra capacity to volunteer for additional stuffs and stretch myself and earn my keep, so to speark. But I also strive to make time for my family, my friends and myself. So working on a more-than-8-hour schedule but still having time to shop, talk and play is nothing new for me.
However, I think I have definitely reached the height of my "stretching" recently. If I take a few minutes and looked at things from an outsider's point of view, I could see signs that I was about to crash and burn. However, I was working on adrenaline mode for the past 7 weeks since it was necessary, and didn't have time to sufficiently recharge... hence I got the worst case of burnt out in my personal history ever.
I can list down each and every thing that happened for the past 3 months that has caused me to work like a slavedriver, but I don't want to sound whiny and immature. However, I would list some signs that I saw in myself that if I had only listened to them would've prevented me from actually having a nervous near-breakdown. Trust me, even though I know I'm definitely not ugly, it was NOT a pretty sight.
1. I had at least one nose bleed per day for the past 2 weeks. My blood pressure shot up, I had headaches even in the morning and I was feverish for the most part of the day.
2. In my case, I didn't even have the time nor energy to blog. If you notice, the number of blog posts I have for July and August is just downright depressing. I literally can't even make myself type something, since I was just too darned sleepy or tired. I also wasn't able to
3. You receive complaints from your family and friends. My son complains that I don't get to tuck him to bed anymore and that he has to text or call me to hear my voice. My friends complain that I keep missing our barkada gatherings. My parents complain that I don't talk to them anymore.
4. Sleeping in odd places at odd times - I actually found myself asleep in the middle of lunch in a restaurant while lunching out with some friends. I also dozed off while riding the shuttle from one office to another. This is definitely a sign that you need rest.
5. I am always distracted, easy to get angry and snap at other people. No matter how nice of a person you are (like me), when you're at a point of being exhausted than you've ever been in your life, you have this tendency to just snap, when you could've easily overlooked it in normal circumstances. Also, you keep forgetting where you've placed your things. You get confused with the same information.
6. I seem to be on a crying spell at any hint of additional trouble. This is actually the scariest symptom of all. My eyes would fill with tears the second that I think of all the issues I have and the task list that seems to just add no matter how much I cross each one out faithfully.
I still believe that I made the right decisions in putting the extra effort despite knowing that I was putting myself into a precarious position. But let's face it, we're all humans. We can't expect to work 24 x 7 and not experience any consequences because of it. There has to be a time to work and a time to play. Next time you see me in a similar situation, feel free to give me a good whack on my head to wake me up! :)
However, I think I have definitely reached the height of my "stretching" recently. If I take a few minutes and looked at things from an outsider's point of view, I could see signs that I was about to crash and burn. However, I was working on adrenaline mode for the past 7 weeks since it was necessary, and didn't have time to sufficiently recharge... hence I got the worst case of burnt out in my personal history ever.
I can list down each and every thing that happened for the past 3 months that has caused me to work like a slavedriver, but I don't want to sound whiny and immature. However, I would list some signs that I saw in myself that if I had only listened to them would've prevented me from actually having a nervous near-breakdown. Trust me, even though I know I'm definitely not ugly, it was NOT a pretty sight.
1. I had at least one nose bleed per day for the past 2 weeks. My blood pressure shot up, I had headaches even in the morning and I was feverish for the most part of the day.
2. In my case, I didn't even have the time nor energy to blog. If you notice, the number of blog posts I have for July and August is just downright depressing. I literally can't even make myself type something, since I was just too darned sleepy or tired. I also wasn't able to
3. You receive complaints from your family and friends. My son complains that I don't get to tuck him to bed anymore and that he has to text or call me to hear my voice. My friends complain that I keep missing our barkada gatherings. My parents complain that I don't talk to them anymore.
4. Sleeping in odd places at odd times - I actually found myself asleep in the middle of lunch in a restaurant while lunching out with some friends. I also dozed off while riding the shuttle from one office to another. This is definitely a sign that you need rest.
5. I am always distracted, easy to get angry and snap at other people. No matter how nice of a person you are (like me), when you're at a point of being exhausted than you've ever been in your life, you have this tendency to just snap, when you could've easily overlooked it in normal circumstances. Also, you keep forgetting where you've placed your things. You get confused with the same information.
6. I seem to be on a crying spell at any hint of additional trouble. This is actually the scariest symptom of all. My eyes would fill with tears the second that I think of all the issues I have and the task list that seems to just add no matter how much I cross each one out faithfully.
I still believe that I made the right decisions in putting the extra effort despite knowing that I was putting myself into a precarious position. But let's face it, we're all humans. We can't expect to work 24 x 7 and not experience any consequences because of it. There has to be a time to work and a time to play. Next time you see me in a similar situation, feel free to give me a good whack on my head to wake me up! :)
On Being Self-Sufficient
As somebody who has led projects and managed resources, and at the same time, has a team to deliver a different set of project portfolio for the year, I know that being self-sufficient is a highly admirable trait. These self-sufficient folks know what they need to do to achieve their objectives and require very mininal supervision. However, if you see this trait on a 6-year old kid, it's just a bit freaky.
My son's new teeth are growing and he had a bit of a cold. Hence, he had fever for the past few days. This meant that he had to miss classes for a few days.
Unfortunately, on the same day, I had to stay overnight in the office because our activities (legitimate project activities) lasted till 5am and I still had to go to work a few hours after. My son, being the self-sufficient little human being that he is, actually wrote himself an excuse letter and requested his nanny to bring it to his teacher.
It read: "Dear Ms. Mercado, I cannot go to school today because I have fever." Then he signed his name at the end. (NOTE: For a guy, my son has a neat handwriting.)
Of course, the teacher was tickled pink when she received the letter. The nanny came home still holding the same excuse letter. She said that the teacher cannot accept a self-made excuse letter. It has to be signed by the parents. But she did get a good laugh out of it.
Geez. I mean I know that my son is more mature than most kids his age, but to have the perception that an excuse letter is needed (he saw me write several before), and to actually compose his own letter is just beyond being self-sufficient. It's downright scary.
Needless to say, I had some explaining to do the very next day. I did manage to produce a typewritten legitimate excuse letter and hand it over to the teacher personally. Fortunately, she had a sense of humor as well, so no harm came out of it.
Next thing I know, my son would be writing himself his own prescription for cough medicine.
My son's new teeth are growing and he had a bit of a cold. Hence, he had fever for the past few days. This meant that he had to miss classes for a few days.
Unfortunately, on the same day, I had to stay overnight in the office because our activities (legitimate project activities) lasted till 5am and I still had to go to work a few hours after. My son, being the self-sufficient little human being that he is, actually wrote himself an excuse letter and requested his nanny to bring it to his teacher.
It read: "Dear Ms. Mercado, I cannot go to school today because I have fever." Then he signed his name at the end. (NOTE: For a guy, my son has a neat handwriting.)
Of course, the teacher was tickled pink when she received the letter. The nanny came home still holding the same excuse letter. She said that the teacher cannot accept a self-made excuse letter. It has to be signed by the parents. But she did get a good laugh out of it.
Geez. I mean I know that my son is more mature than most kids his age, but to have the perception that an excuse letter is needed (he saw me write several before), and to actually compose his own letter is just beyond being self-sufficient. It's downright scary.
Needless to say, I had some explaining to do the very next day. I did manage to produce a typewritten legitimate excuse letter and hand it over to the teacher personally. Fortunately, she had a sense of humor as well, so no harm came out of it.
Next thing I know, my son would be writing himself his own prescription for cough medicine.
Sunday, August 5, 2007
Birthday Blast
Last week, I hinted (not too subtly I might add) that I was having a major dose of birthday blues. Surprisingly, contrary to my fears, I had the best-est birthday blast this year.
The thing is, I can't decide which gift I like best...
... this gorgeous white-gold heart-shaped pendant necklace accompanied by a tear-jerking message
... full body massage and foot reflexology at the spa (where I promptly fell asleep and woke up feeling like noodles)
... one hour of fun-filled salsa lessons
... interesting books to read (Purpose-Driven Life, All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, It Was On Fire When I Lay It Down)
... super comfy boxer shorts from Marks & Spencers
... heavenly bath products from Body Shop and Marks & Spencers
... a surprise birthday lunch in office
... yummy dessert and crepes at Cafe Briton while chatting with family and friends
... greetings/emails/phone calls from relatives and friends from all over
But then again I thought, "Wait, why do I have to choose?" I should just accept the gifts as is and appreciate each for their own uniqueness.
Thanks to everyone who made my 29th birthday a real blast! :)
The thing is, I can't decide which gift I like best...
... this gorgeous white-gold heart-shaped pendant necklace accompanied by a tear-jerking message
... full body massage and foot reflexology at the spa (where I promptly fell asleep and woke up feeling like noodles)
... one hour of fun-filled salsa lessons
... interesting books to read (Purpose-Driven Life, All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, It Was On Fire When I Lay It Down)
... super comfy boxer shorts from Marks & Spencers
... heavenly bath products from Body Shop and Marks & Spencers
... a surprise birthday lunch in office
... yummy dessert and crepes at Cafe Briton while chatting with family and friends
... greetings/emails/phone calls from relatives and friends from all over
But then again I thought, "Wait, why do I have to choose?" I should just accept the gifts as is and appreciate each for their own uniqueness.
Thanks to everyone who made my 29th birthday a real blast! :)
Thursday, August 2, 2007
Song of the Month - August 2007
Reflection
by Christina Aguilera
Look at me
You make think you see who I really am
But you'll never know me
Ev'ry day It's as if I play a part
Now I see If I wear a mask
I can fool the world
But I cannot fool my heart
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
I am now
In a world where I have to hide my heart
But somehow I will show the world
What's inside my heart
And be loved for who I am
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
Must I pretend that I'm
Someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
There's a heart that must be free to fly
That burns with a need to know the reason why
Why must we all conceal
What we think,
How we feel?
Must there be a secret me I'm forced to hide?
I won't pretend that I'm someone else
For all time
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
by Christina Aguilera
Look at me
You make think you see who I really am
But you'll never know me
Ev'ry day It's as if I play a part
Now I see If I wear a mask
I can fool the world
But I cannot fool my heart
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
I am now
In a world where I have to hide my heart
But somehow I will show the world
What's inside my heart
And be loved for who I am
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
Must I pretend that I'm
Someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
There's a heart that must be free to fly
That burns with a need to know the reason why
Why must we all conceal
What we think,
How we feel?
Must there be a secret me I'm forced to hide?
I won't pretend that I'm someone else
For all time
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Silence Means...
Silence in the communication within the corporate world is easy to decipher. It means you concur and have stamped your 'ok' in the recommendation after you reviewed it thoroughly.
But what about other situations outside of work?
I fear that it is not that easy to interpret. And making wrong assumptions could end up costing a great friendship or something more.
after a great date. You just had the most perfect date the night before. Both the weather and your hair cooperated. which is a miracle in itself. Everything was just perfect. In fact, you're 100% sure that your date feels the same way. Morning comes, no call. Fine, that must mean he's a late sleeper. Lunch, still nada. By the time you're about to eat dinner, your stomach is churning and you feel embarrassed that you must've read too much last night. What the heck does silence mean in this case?
during intimate moments. People have difficulty in confessing or sharing something personal because they cannot predict accurately what the reaction would be. And sometimes, because of the uncertainty of acceptance, you would just kept those thoughts to yourself rather than risking the possibility of rejection and judgement.
I love you.
*silence then just runs away.
I'm pregnant.
*silence then faints
I had an abortion five years ago.
*silence then looks at her like she's the devil incarnate
In these cases, just the mere thought of these reactions would make you just keep your mouth shut rather than risk the humiliation afterwards.
after a fight/disagreement/discussion (whatever you want to call it). I received a great advise from a priest before I got married. Do not go to bed when you're still angry with each other. I believe that this is applicable even in friendship. One might even wonder whether or not the partner cares anymore, if he or she doesn't even bother talking to her after a fight. Sometimes prolonging the forgiveness and making up in the name of giving each other space and time to cool off might actually lead to eternal separation, thereby doing more harm than good.
during conversations. Silence during conversation can both be positive and negative. It really depends on the mood. There is what we call comfortable silence, which is when both parties just enjoy the peaks and lulls of the tête-à -tête. They do not panic whenever there's dead air. However, sometimes silence is just too defeaning and you end up concluding that you don't have the same wavelength. From what I hear, most blind dates has more of the latter.
Silence in the right scenario could prove to be a powerful tool. Your mom doesn't have to say anything but you know that you're in trouble with just a look. Your boss just raises his eyebrows and you know that he is displeased with something.
But let's face it. However useful it is, silence is still prone to wrong interpretation which might lead to inaccurate conclusions. Doesn't it make more sense to just verbalize your feelings straight out? Am I the only one who believes in being that being brutally frank (within the right context, of course) is still the best way to build trust and openness in a relationship? Should people still play that cat-and-mouse game regardless of how old they are?
I don't doubt whoever coined the famous phrase "silence speaks a thousand words". It really does. Now only if he could specify as well what those "thousand words" actually refer to. I believe our lives would be much, much simpler and happier.
But what about other situations outside of work?
I fear that it is not that easy to interpret. And making wrong assumptions could end up costing a great friendship or something more.
after a great date. You just had the most perfect date the night before. Both the weather and your hair cooperated. which is a miracle in itself. Everything was just perfect. In fact, you're 100% sure that your date feels the same way. Morning comes, no call. Fine, that must mean he's a late sleeper. Lunch, still nada. By the time you're about to eat dinner, your stomach is churning and you feel embarrassed that you must've read too much last night. What the heck does silence mean in this case?
during intimate moments. People have difficulty in confessing or sharing something personal because they cannot predict accurately what the reaction would be. And sometimes, because of the uncertainty of acceptance, you would just kept those thoughts to yourself rather than risking the possibility of rejection and judgement.
I love you.
*silence then just runs away.
I'm pregnant.
*silence then faints
I had an abortion five years ago.
*silence then looks at her like she's the devil incarnate
In these cases, just the mere thought of these reactions would make you just keep your mouth shut rather than risk the humiliation afterwards.
after a fight/disagreement/discussion (whatever you want to call it). I received a great advise from a priest before I got married. Do not go to bed when you're still angry with each other. I believe that this is applicable even in friendship. One might even wonder whether or not the partner cares anymore, if he or she doesn't even bother talking to her after a fight. Sometimes prolonging the forgiveness and making up in the name of giving each other space and time to cool off might actually lead to eternal separation, thereby doing more harm than good.
during conversations. Silence during conversation can both be positive and negative. It really depends on the mood. There is what we call comfortable silence, which is when both parties just enjoy the peaks and lulls of the tête-à -tête. They do not panic whenever there's dead air. However, sometimes silence is just too defeaning and you end up concluding that you don't have the same wavelength. From what I hear, most blind dates has more of the latter.
Silence in the right scenario could prove to be a powerful tool. Your mom doesn't have to say anything but you know that you're in trouble with just a look. Your boss just raises his eyebrows and you know that he is displeased with something.
But let's face it. However useful it is, silence is still prone to wrong interpretation which might lead to inaccurate conclusions. Doesn't it make more sense to just verbalize your feelings straight out? Am I the only one who believes in being that being brutally frank (within the right context, of course) is still the best way to build trust and openness in a relationship? Should people still play that cat-and-mouse game regardless of how old they are?
I don't doubt whoever coined the famous phrase "silence speaks a thousand words". It really does. Now only if he could specify as well what those "thousand words" actually refer to. I believe our lives would be much, much simpler and happier.
Beating the Birthday Blues
It's exactly 10 days before my 29th birthday and I'm not looking forward to it. It's not because I'm turning 29, mind you. Contray to my recent post ("Getting Old"), age doesn't really bother me that much, since I know I basically still look the same (Can you believe I still get asked at the airport to indicate who my guardian is? Apparently, I still look like a minor to Westerners. :P)
Based from experience, I always get slightly depressed and a lot apprehensive as my birthday approaches. Being the control freak that I am, it really drives me crazy not knowing what I'll do yet on that day. Being the shy dudette that I am (seriously), I also don't want to impose and demand that my friends give up their day and spend it with me. That leaves me with no option except to plan out the day for myself. And that is why the situation is a bit depressing.
Maybe it's because it's three in the morning and I'm still working on my team's resource allocation plans. Maybe it's because I'm just so freaking tired from working at the office for exactly 14 days without any rest in between. Maybe it's because I'm not even sure that there's a someone special out there who is excited enough to want to spend this day with me...
But then again, I figured it's time to stop this vicious cycle. I'm through with being depressed on my birthday. I've decided to beat the birthday blues... or at least die trying to.
I love lists (this is so not obvious). I wanted to come up with a list of brilliant suggestions on how to beat the birthday blues, but I honestly can't think of any.
Suggestions, anyone?
Based from experience, I always get slightly depressed and a lot apprehensive as my birthday approaches. Being the control freak that I am, it really drives me crazy not knowing what I'll do yet on that day. Being the shy dudette that I am (seriously), I also don't want to impose and demand that my friends give up their day and spend it with me. That leaves me with no option except to plan out the day for myself. And that is why the situation is a bit depressing.
Maybe it's because it's three in the morning and I'm still working on my team's resource allocation plans. Maybe it's because I'm just so freaking tired from working at the office for exactly 14 days without any rest in between. Maybe it's because I'm not even sure that there's a someone special out there who is excited enough to want to spend this day with me...
But then again, I figured it's time to stop this vicious cycle. I'm through with being depressed on my birthday. I've decided to beat the birthday blues... or at least die trying to.
I love lists (this is so not obvious). I wanted to come up with a list of brilliant suggestions on how to beat the birthday blues, but I honestly can't think of any.
Suggestions, anyone?
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Getting Old
I am one of the few lucky people who is still working on the same job that I had first gotten into right after college. I find fulfillment in what I do. I cam afford to splurge a little once in a while. But more importantly, I appreciate the culture and principles of most of the people I interact with 5 out of 7 days in a week.
This year marks my 7th year working for P&G. This isn't a big number compared to colleagues in other regions who have worked in P&G all their lives and have kids almost the same age as me. Nevertheless, Asia is quite a young organization and I am starting to feel my age manifest itself in the work area.
1. You get questions about the older versions of your systems. When I started working, we were using SAP version 3.0. The 2 previous projects I managed actually moved the last 5 markets in Asia from version 3.0 to version 4.5. This is what we're currently using for the past six years. And now, we are moving again from version 4.5 to version 6. And I have personally witnessed this evolution.
2. It gets more and more difficult to recover from jet lag during and after a business trip. When I was a new hire, regardless of how many continents I've crossed, I would automatically drop my bags in the hotel room and go to the nearest outlet mall and shop till I drop. Now by the time I recover from jet lag, I'm about to return home, which means I need to recover from reverse jet lag again when I'm back.
3. Nobody knows my contacts anymore. I find myself referencing to certain pioneers who have stayed and helped built the organization in Manila and people just stare back at me blankly. They don't know them anymore! It's either that or they have left the company and become CIOs or CFOs in some other company.
4. The people you hire keep getting younger and younger. I get applicants who have just turned 20. The year they graduate from grade school is same as the year you graduated from college! It makes me feel quite jaded sometimes to hear their excited chatter about school projects and thesis during interviews. Sometimes I honestly fear that I can't relate anymore.
5. Your organization's name has changed at least 3x. In the main group that I work in for the past seven years, we have changed names 4x. Even the IT department has changed 3x. Our bigger work groups keep changing names as well. This is the reason why I don't bother memorizing what the names are. I just make sure I know where the latest org charts and I'll survive the next 10 changes.
6. You still remember what the old offices look (and smell) like. This is actually the only positive thing in my list. Knowing what the old offices look like, I have a better appreciation of the current work area I have. And I've also seen the old offices in Singapore and Guangzhou. Trust me, what we have now is way better than what was there five years ago.
Sigh. I am getting old.
This year marks my 7th year working for P&G. This isn't a big number compared to colleagues in other regions who have worked in P&G all their lives and have kids almost the same age as me. Nevertheless, Asia is quite a young organization and I am starting to feel my age manifest itself in the work area.
1. You get questions about the older versions of your systems. When I started working, we were using SAP version 3.0. The 2 previous projects I managed actually moved the last 5 markets in Asia from version 3.0 to version 4.5. This is what we're currently using for the past six years. And now, we are moving again from version 4.5 to version 6. And I have personally witnessed this evolution.
2. It gets more and more difficult to recover from jet lag during and after a business trip. When I was a new hire, regardless of how many continents I've crossed, I would automatically drop my bags in the hotel room and go to the nearest outlet mall and shop till I drop. Now by the time I recover from jet lag, I'm about to return home, which means I need to recover from reverse jet lag again when I'm back.
3. Nobody knows my contacts anymore. I find myself referencing to certain pioneers who have stayed and helped built the organization in Manila and people just stare back at me blankly. They don't know them anymore! It's either that or they have left the company and become CIOs or CFOs in some other company.
4. The people you hire keep getting younger and younger. I get applicants who have just turned 20. The year they graduate from grade school is same as the year you graduated from college! It makes me feel quite jaded sometimes to hear their excited chatter about school projects and thesis during interviews. Sometimes I honestly fear that I can't relate anymore.
5. Your organization's name has changed at least 3x. In the main group that I work in for the past seven years, we have changed names 4x. Even the IT department has changed 3x. Our bigger work groups keep changing names as well. This is the reason why I don't bother memorizing what the names are. I just make sure I know where the latest org charts and I'll survive the next 10 changes.
6. You still remember what the old offices look (and smell) like. This is actually the only positive thing in my list. Knowing what the old offices look like, I have a better appreciation of the current work area I have. And I've also seen the old offices in Singapore and Guangzhou. Trust me, what we have now is way better than what was there five years ago.
Sigh. I am getting old.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Applying Project Management
Thinking about my vacation plans always puts me in a good mood. Moreover, knowing that I have my boss and future boss's approval for a 3-week (read: 21 work-free days) gets me in an even better mood.
There's nothing I like better than planning for my vacation months in advance to the level of detail that I know exactly what I'll do (and what I'll wear) at every waking and sleeping hour of my total itinerary. I know it sounds a bit overwhelming considering it is still 9 months away, but I'd rather think and plan it thoroughly rather than catch up at the last minute. A bit too much? Maybe. But as long as it gives me pleasure and my vacations prove to be efficient, smooth and not over budget, then I'm good.
The way I approach planning for anything is using Successful Project Management (SPM) methodology - the very same IT course that I own and train in office. I truly believe in its concepts. I also believe that it is applicable in both work and personal stuffs.
What is my project name? US Trip 2008
Who is the project sponsor? Me
Who is the project manager? Me
What is the project background?
My son's 5-year US visa is expiring by mid-April 2008. Based from experience, it will be difficult to renew it if it has not been used at least once before it expires. This project aims to plan and complete the US trip in a timely and fun manner.
What is the scope of the project?
People - me, my son and my favorite sister
Geography - USA (required), other places (optional)
What are my constraints?
1. The trip cannot exceed 3 weeks.
2. US visa expiry date is mid-April 2008.
3. The trip should be done after classes end and after awarding ceremony.
What are my assumptions?
1. Last day of school is usually mid-March 2008.
2. Graduation and awarding ceremony is normally on last week of March. This also assumes that my son will get a medal and would therefore need to participate. :)
3. Relatives would welcome us and let us stay in their homes during the trip.
4. I would be able to secure 2 adult tickets using my mileage and that my son's grandmother would pay for his ticket.
What are my success criteria?
Cost - Should not exceed estimated budget
Time - Should not exceed 3 weeks
Quality - Should have fun!!!
I haven't come up with a risk assessment yet as well as a detailed work breakdown structure and schedule. But I'm sure I'll get to that.
I also need to get this "signed off" by my stakeholders. This refers to everyone who will be affected by this project. It definitely includes my family, my boss and some other key folks.
Wish me luck, folks.
Long live project management!
There's nothing I like better than planning for my vacation months in advance to the level of detail that I know exactly what I'll do (and what I'll wear) at every waking and sleeping hour of my total itinerary. I know it sounds a bit overwhelming considering it is still 9 months away, but I'd rather think and plan it thoroughly rather than catch up at the last minute. A bit too much? Maybe. But as long as it gives me pleasure and my vacations prove to be efficient, smooth and not over budget, then I'm good.
The way I approach planning for anything is using Successful Project Management (SPM) methodology - the very same IT course that I own and train in office. I truly believe in its concepts. I also believe that it is applicable in both work and personal stuffs.
What is my project name? US Trip 2008
Who is the project sponsor? Me
Who is the project manager? Me
What is the project background?
My son's 5-year US visa is expiring by mid-April 2008. Based from experience, it will be difficult to renew it if it has not been used at least once before it expires. This project aims to plan and complete the US trip in a timely and fun manner.
What is the scope of the project?
People - me, my son and my favorite sister
Geography - USA (required), other places (optional)
What are my constraints?
1. The trip cannot exceed 3 weeks.
2. US visa expiry date is mid-April 2008.
3. The trip should be done after classes end and after awarding ceremony.
What are my assumptions?
1. Last day of school is usually mid-March 2008.
2. Graduation and awarding ceremony is normally on last week of March. This also assumes that my son will get a medal and would therefore need to participate. :)
3. Relatives would welcome us and let us stay in their homes during the trip.
4. I would be able to secure 2 adult tickets using my mileage and that my son's grandmother would pay for his ticket.
What are my success criteria?
Cost - Should not exceed estimated budget
Time - Should not exceed 3 weeks
Quality - Should have fun!!!
I haven't come up with a risk assessment yet as well as a detailed work breakdown structure and schedule. But I'm sure I'll get to that.
I also need to get this "signed off" by my stakeholders. This refers to everyone who will be affected by this project. It definitely includes my family, my boss and some other key folks.
Wish me luck, folks.
Long live project management!
Monday, July 16, 2007
Beyond Blogging
To my surprise, I realize that there are still at least ten things in life I'd rather do than blog.
*gasps*
Yes, it's true. There is a bigger world out there than blogging. I'm trying to say that line with a straight face.
Don't get me wrong. I'm a fan of writing. In fact, I'm a huge fan of blogging. For those of you who visit my blog regularly, or those of you who know me personally, you know that I try to be faithful and write at least 2x every week. And that's the minimum. So a 2-week hiatus for me is something very, very rare indeed.
If my blog is my girlfriend (assuming I'm a guy of course, or a lesbian at the very least), I would've had to do serious ass-kissing, flower-buying and kneeling/begging for forgiveness if I wanted to retain my non-single status.
I know, I know. I've neglected my blog/girl/boyfriend. But believe me, I have valid reasons for doing so... Hmm. Now I sound exactly like a guy. Hehe.
Anyway, after having survived another stressful fiscal year end and 9 major projects cutting over at the same time, with 2 unexpected resignations within the past 60 days and spent 2 straight weekends working in the office fixing major showstopper issues, I realize that blogging will have to take second place over these things.
1. Sleep. Rest. Nap. Whatever the term is, nothing still beats getting some serious shut-eye.
2. Talk on the phone for hours with a good friend.
3. Eat La Pinay crepe at Cafe Briton in Greenbelt. I had been working for 12 straight hours 2 Sundays ago, but I readily agreed to join my mom, my aunt and my brother for some dessert even though I seriously needed some sleep.
4. Watch "Transformers."
5. Watch "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix."
6. Watch my son sleep. Last night was the first time in over a week that I was able to tuck my son to bed. All other nights, I had to rely on kissing him goodnight while he's somewhere in dreamland.
7. Figure out who would do what projects for the next 12 month. I'll be honest. I like blogging more than this. But I can't very well have a completed blog article and a half-baked resource allocation and work plan for my team. I am responsible most of the time, you know.
8. Psychoanalyze a mutual acquaintance and debate whether or not he is suffering from severe depression.
9. Conduct training on project management and system architecture for my colleagues. What can I say? Training has been and will always be one of my passions in life.
10. Play X-box with my son. I suck at games. Seriously. I'm so bad that even other 4 or 5-year-olds beat me. But I just can't no when my son sweetly offers to teach me how to play and reassures me that I don't play that bad for a girl.
And in case you haven't figured it out yet, the above list also contains most of the stuff I did in between whatever little free time I had over the past 15 days.
There you have it folks. There is life beyond blogging. But having said that, I'm still glad to be home again, blogging to all my heart's content... You won't get rid of this addicted blogger that easily. :)
*gasps*
Yes, it's true. There is a bigger world out there than blogging. I'm trying to say that line with a straight face.
Don't get me wrong. I'm a fan of writing. In fact, I'm a huge fan of blogging. For those of you who visit my blog regularly, or those of you who know me personally, you know that I try to be faithful and write at least 2x every week. And that's the minimum. So a 2-week hiatus for me is something very, very rare indeed.
If my blog is my girlfriend (assuming I'm a guy of course, or a lesbian at the very least), I would've had to do serious ass-kissing, flower-buying and kneeling/begging for forgiveness if I wanted to retain my non-single status.
I know, I know. I've neglected my blog/girl/boyfriend. But believe me, I have valid reasons for doing so... Hmm. Now I sound exactly like a guy. Hehe.
Anyway, after having survived another stressful fiscal year end and 9 major projects cutting over at the same time, with 2 unexpected resignations within the past 60 days and spent 2 straight weekends working in the office fixing major showstopper issues, I realize that blogging will have to take second place over these things.
1. Sleep. Rest. Nap. Whatever the term is, nothing still beats getting some serious shut-eye.
2. Talk on the phone for hours with a good friend.
3. Eat La Pinay crepe at Cafe Briton in Greenbelt. I had been working for 12 straight hours 2 Sundays ago, but I readily agreed to join my mom, my aunt and my brother for some dessert even though I seriously needed some sleep.
4. Watch "Transformers."
5. Watch "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix."
6. Watch my son sleep. Last night was the first time in over a week that I was able to tuck my son to bed. All other nights, I had to rely on kissing him goodnight while he's somewhere in dreamland.
7. Figure out who would do what projects for the next 12 month. I'll be honest. I like blogging more than this. But I can't very well have a completed blog article and a half-baked resource allocation and work plan for my team. I am responsible most of the time, you know.
8. Psychoanalyze a mutual acquaintance and debate whether or not he is suffering from severe depression.
9. Conduct training on project management and system architecture for my colleagues. What can I say? Training has been and will always be one of my passions in life.
10. Play X-box with my son. I suck at games. Seriously. I'm so bad that even other 4 or 5-year-olds beat me. But I just can't no when my son sweetly offers to teach me how to play and reassures me that I don't play that bad for a girl.
And in case you haven't figured it out yet, the above list also contains most of the stuff I did in between whatever little free time I had over the past 15 days.
There you have it folks. There is life beyond blogging. But having said that, I'm still glad to be home again, blogging to all my heart's content... You won't get rid of this addicted blogger that easily. :)
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Song of the Month - July 2007
Lead Me Lord
by Gary Valenciano
lead me lord
lead me by the hand
and help me face the rising sun
comfort me through all the pain and life may bring
there's no other hope that i can lean upon
lead me lord
lead me all my life
walk by me
walk by me across the lonely roads that i may face
take my arms and let your hand show me the way
show the way to live inside your heart
all my days
all my life
you are my light
you're the lamp upon my feet
all the time my lord i need you there
you are my light
i cannot live alone
let me stay by your guiding love
all through my life
lead me lord
lead me lord
even though at times i'd rather go along my way
give me take the right direction take your road
lead me lord and never leave my side
all my days
all my life
by Gary Valenciano
lead me lord
lead me by the hand
and help me face the rising sun
comfort me through all the pain and life may bring
there's no other hope that i can lean upon
lead me lord
lead me all my life
walk by me
walk by me across the lonely roads that i may face
take my arms and let your hand show me the way
show the way to live inside your heart
all my days
all my life
you are my light
you're the lamp upon my feet
all the time my lord i need you there
you are my light
i cannot live alone
let me stay by your guiding love
all through my life
lead me lord
lead me lord
even though at times i'd rather go along my way
give me take the right direction take your road
lead me lord and never leave my side
all my days
all my life
Friday, June 29, 2007
Balance Sheet of Life
A close colleague forwarded this article just a few days ago.
Although my work is really IT in nature, I have been exposed to the accounting side during my 7-year stay in the company. Although I can never claim to be a certified accountant nor an accountant at heart, I have learned little by little to appreciate the complexities and wonders behind financial statements, debit/credit and the like. This is the reason why I felt such an affinity when I read this particular article... Enjoy reading! :)
Although my work is really IT in nature, I have been exposed to the accounting side during my 7-year stay in the company. Although I can never claim to be a certified accountant nor an accountant at heart, I have learned little by little to appreciate the complexities and wonders behind financial statements, debit/credit and the like. This is the reason why I felt such an affinity when I read this particular article... Enjoy reading! :)
Balance Sheet of Life
Our Birth is our Opening Balance
Our Death is our Closing Balance
Our Prejudiced Views are our Liabilities
Our Creative Ideas are our Assets
Heart is our Current Asset
Soul is our Fixed Asset
Brain is our Fixed Deposit
Thinking is our Current Account
Achievements are our Capital
Character & Morals, our Stock-in-trade
Friends are our General Reserves
Values & Behavior are our Goodwill
Patience is our Interest Earned
Love is our Dividend
Children are our Bonus Issues
Education is Brands / Patents
Knowledge is our Investment
Experience is our Premium Account
The Aim is to Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately.
The Goal is to get the Best Presented Accounts Award.
Our Birth is our Opening Balance
Our Death is our Closing Balance
Our Prejudiced Views are our Liabilities
Our Creative Ideas are our Assets
Heart is our Current Asset
Soul is our Fixed Asset
Brain is our Fixed Deposit
Thinking is our Current Account
Achievements are our Capital
Character & Morals, our Stock-in-trade
Friends are our General Reserves
Values & Behavior are our Goodwill
Patience is our Interest Earned
Love is our Dividend
Children are our Bonus Issues
Education is Brands / Patents
Knowledge is our Investment
Experience is our Premium Account
The Aim is to Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately.
The Goal is to get the Best Presented Accounts Award.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Ouch!
I never knew that the probability of getting hit by a ball in your own garden is apparently very high.
I was just sitting in the garden, minding my own business and reading a new book. I hear two high-pitched voices shouting, "Watch out!!!" Since my mind was on the book that I was reading (don't ask me which scene in the romance novel I was actually reading that time :P), I reacted too late. A few milliseconds after the warning, I felt something hard hit my face, specifically exactly on my left eye.
The world literally turned black for a few seconds and I just couldn't help but bend over, moaning in pain. I saw stars -- or at least some fragments of bright lights bursting sporadically in my world of darkness... Now I know why cartoons always have stars above the head whenever somebody gets punched in the face.
I wish I could say a few feminine tears rolled down from the corner of my eyes, but I have to confess that I bawled my eyes out and cried for my mommy. It really hurt. Seriously.
...
For that matter, why are softballs called such anyway, when they're obviously not soft? I should send a formal complaint to ... err... to whoever came up with that term... whoever he may be or has been.
Luckily or unluckily, depending on how you view it, I didn't get any permanent scars. Lucky because I don't have to show up at work with a black eye. I might scare my two new hires even before their first month is over. Unlucky because I have nothing to prove that this actually occurred. I can't even use it to make my neighbors who threw the ball feel more guilty than they already do. Just kidding, I'm too nice to do that to kids. Adults maybe, but not kids.
I was just sitting in the garden, minding my own business and reading a new book. I hear two high-pitched voices shouting, "Watch out!!!" Since my mind was on the book that I was reading (don't ask me which scene in the romance novel I was actually reading that time :P), I reacted too late. A few milliseconds after the warning, I felt something hard hit my face, specifically exactly on my left eye.
The world literally turned black for a few seconds and I just couldn't help but bend over, moaning in pain. I saw stars -- or at least some fragments of bright lights bursting sporadically in my world of darkness... Now I know why cartoons always have stars above the head whenever somebody gets punched in the face.
I wish I could say a few feminine tears rolled down from the corner of my eyes, but I have to confess that I bawled my eyes out and cried for my mommy. It really hurt. Seriously.
...
For that matter, why are softballs called such anyway, when they're obviously not soft? I should send a formal complaint to ... err... to whoever came up with that term... whoever he may be or has been.
Luckily or unluckily, depending on how you view it, I didn't get any permanent scars. Lucky because I don't have to show up at work with a black eye. I might scare my two new hires even before their first month is over. Unlucky because I have nothing to prove that this actually occurred. I can't even use it to make my neighbors who threw the ball feel more guilty than they already do. Just kidding, I'm too nice to do that to kids. Adults maybe, but not kids.
Monday, June 25, 2007
Chance
I'd like to think we live in a modern world. We frown upon archaic notions that women should stay inside the kitchen and not be seen or heard outside. We welcome innovative ideas and encourage youngsters to be creative and think out-of-the-box. We also celebrate success stories of how a certain person has overcome poverty and corruption and rose to fame and stardom.
But then again, no matter how long the journey to modernization has been, I realize there are still remnants of discrimination that exist in society today.
I find it is extremely disconcerting that for once, I am the object of someone else's dislike, just because of unusual circumstances, some of which are not completely within my control and influence. There is just something fundamentally wrong about objecting to somebody just because he happens to be born of darker color than you, or maybe she just happens to have come out from a failed marriage due to extraordinary circumstances.
Should one allow himself be boxed into the limited world that he has experienced so far? Should people be judged at all? What should be the standard for judging if one is worthy or not? It's as if all prior good deeds and accomplishments you have had so far amount to nothing. Just with a look - you feel this small.
How does one react to such attitude? How does one defend himself from stereotypes? Can you actually teach old dogs new tricks? Or should we just accept that discrimination is a fact of life and hence, can never escape it?
Logically, there are several ways to respond to this. You can just grin and bear it, despite feeling your heart break into tiny pieces inside. Rely on your good ol' humor to see you through the day. You can always shrug your shoulders and convince yourself that "heck, you can't expect to please everyone." You can also choose to resent the individuals for their narrow-minded thinking. All these are possible reactions, but none of them actually solve the root cause of the problem. It still doesn't remove the barrier and somehow will the other person to tolerate you, despite the fact that you would do anything humanly possible to convince her that you're a nice person.
At the end of the day, all one wants is a chance... a chance to prove that despite everything, you are a wonderful and interesting person who deserves a second shot at Cupid's Arrow. A chance to let them see the 'real' you behind the skin color or the status. A chance to show that the world is bigger than what we currently know and see, and that the unknown might bring greater happiness than we could possibly imagine. And if, after given that fair chance, you still have objections, then I would be the first to walk away from the relationship graciously, without any ill feelings.
That is all one could hope for. It is what I only wish for -- just a simple chance.
But then again, no matter how long the journey to modernization has been, I realize there are still remnants of discrimination that exist in society today.
I find it is extremely disconcerting that for once, I am the object of someone else's dislike, just because of unusual circumstances, some of which are not completely within my control and influence. There is just something fundamentally wrong about objecting to somebody just because he happens to be born of darker color than you, or maybe she just happens to have come out from a failed marriage due to extraordinary circumstances.
Should one allow himself be boxed into the limited world that he has experienced so far? Should people be judged at all? What should be the standard for judging if one is worthy or not? It's as if all prior good deeds and accomplishments you have had so far amount to nothing. Just with a look - you feel this small.
How does one react to such attitude? How does one defend himself from stereotypes? Can you actually teach old dogs new tricks? Or should we just accept that discrimination is a fact of life and hence, can never escape it?
Logically, there are several ways to respond to this. You can just grin and bear it, despite feeling your heart break into tiny pieces inside. Rely on your good ol' humor to see you through the day. You can always shrug your shoulders and convince yourself that "heck, you can't expect to please everyone." You can also choose to resent the individuals for their narrow-minded thinking. All these are possible reactions, but none of them actually solve the root cause of the problem. It still doesn't remove the barrier and somehow will the other person to tolerate you, despite the fact that you would do anything humanly possible to convince her that you're a nice person.
At the end of the day, all one wants is a chance... a chance to prove that despite everything, you are a wonderful and interesting person who deserves a second shot at Cupid's Arrow. A chance to let them see the 'real' you behind the skin color or the status. A chance to show that the world is bigger than what we currently know and see, and that the unknown might bring greater happiness than we could possibly imagine. And if, after given that fair chance, you still have objections, then I would be the first to walk away from the relationship graciously, without any ill feelings.
That is all one could hope for. It is what I only wish for -- just a simple chance.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Lost and Found
After I moved out from the condo unit back to my parent's house, I had avoided cleaning my room for the longest possible time.
The fire a few months back made a pretty darn good excuse since it meant weeks of renovation for the burnt attic. Blaming my busy schedule at work also worked for a couple of times. But, as we always say, good things must come to an end. I just HAD to start cleaning out my closet, or I might find myself sent out of my room (at this age and time) without a bed to sleep on for the night.
Amidst the grime and dust, I had found some rather interesting stuff that I thought I had lost through the years.
... my first Valentine's card from this gangly kid whom I played pretend games with back in third grade (The memory of an 11-year old declaring his love for you while you're pretending to be mommy and daddy is pretty cute.)
... a stackful of Post-Its that my friends and I passed around during Biology and Filipino class to pass the time
... an unsent and unfinished love letter that I insisted on writing to my crush asking him to marry me back in sixth grade (thank God I didn't have money for stamps.)
... several birthday cards sent by thoughtful friends acquaintances over the years
... snapshots of me and my friends during my 18th birthday, wearing the most hideous debutante dresses (I can't believe that was the fad at that time.)
... old notebooks with doodles of my name intertwined with an old crush from college
I can't help but spend a few moments to go through those things one by one, line by line.
Some made me laugh at the sheer silliness of the words. Some left a bittersweet ache in my heart, remembering "the one/s who got away". Some just made me shudder and fervently wish that I had more sense than to wear shoulder pads to my prom night.
But regardlessof the situation, each and every one of them managed to envoke a reaction from me. It stirred some long-forgotten memories that played a huge part in your growing up years.
And I guess, at the end of the day, this is what makes cleaning my closet worthwhile. Because I get to find hidden treasures. And I get to walk down the memory lane once again. I wonder what other stuff I might find when I clean my room again, let's say, 5 years from now? :)
The fire a few months back made a pretty darn good excuse since it meant weeks of renovation for the burnt attic. Blaming my busy schedule at work also worked for a couple of times. But, as we always say, good things must come to an end. I just HAD to start cleaning out my closet, or I might find myself sent out of my room (at this age and time) without a bed to sleep on for the night.
Amidst the grime and dust, I had found some rather interesting stuff that I thought I had lost through the years.
... my first Valentine's card from this gangly kid whom I played pretend games with back in third grade (The memory of an 11-year old declaring his love for you while you're pretending to be mommy and daddy is pretty cute.)
... a stackful of Post-Its that my friends and I passed around during Biology and Filipino class to pass the time
... an unsent and unfinished love letter that I insisted on writing to my crush asking him to marry me back in sixth grade (thank God I didn't have money for stamps.)
... several birthday cards sent by thoughtful friends acquaintances over the years
... snapshots of me and my friends during my 18th birthday, wearing the most hideous debutante dresses (I can't believe that was the fad at that time.)
... old notebooks with doodles of my name intertwined with an old crush from college
I can't help but spend a few moments to go through those things one by one, line by line.
Some made me laugh at the sheer silliness of the words. Some left a bittersweet ache in my heart, remembering "the one/s who got away". Some just made me shudder and fervently wish that I had more sense than to wear shoulder pads to my prom night.
But regardlessof the situation, each and every one of them managed to envoke a reaction from me. It stirred some long-forgotten memories that played a huge part in your growing up years.
And I guess, at the end of the day, this is what makes cleaning my closet worthwhile. Because I get to find hidden treasures. And I get to walk down the memory lane once again. I wonder what other stuff I might find when I clean my room again, let's say, 5 years from now? :)
Monday, June 18, 2007
This is the Life!
One thing that amazes me about the beach is that the sky looks different each day. I could literally spend the whole day just staying by the shore and watch the sky change from blue to orange to purple and other combinations imaginable to mankind.
Just wanted to share some pics that my friends took. We spent 3 glorious stress-free days in La Luz Beach Resort in Batangas City.
Me with Swats on her first vacation in Manila after working in the US for 2 years
Me with my friends from school (and their boylets)
Me and my favorite boy :) You may notice how strategically positioned he is such that he blocks my err... very flat tummy? Yep he's a smart kid all right. :)
Great food, great view, great company.... What more can I ask for?
Aaaah... this is definitely the life!
Sunday, June 17, 2007
It Only Happens in Movies
I remember watching a Tagalog movie trailer that shows how the couple met for the first time at the escalator in a mall. They were going in opposite directions. However, they both notice each other at the same time. Guy smiles first, girl smiles back, and they keep staring at each other until they have to get off.
I don't remember who they were or what the title of the movie was, but I do remember scoffing at that particular scene and thinking how unrealistic it was. I said to myself, "Now that only happens in movies."
Another particular scene that I remember from a different movie is that a complete stranger comes up, introduces himself to you and asks for your number. "That only happens in movies." Same line but followed immediately by a rather unladylike and loud snort.
Apparently it doesn't just happens in movies.
Granted, both examples above only happened once each in my whole life. (The escalator scene happened just a while ago at Mall of Asia. The guy who introduced himself to me happened to be my first boyfriend who I've broken up with more than 10 years ago). But at least I know that it does happen and those scenes aren't just figments of the writer's imagination.
I will be first to admit when I'm wrong and this is one of those times. One probably shouldn't shoot down romantic and goosebump-able ideas and deem them unrealistic just because one hasn't experienced them yet.
Who knows? Maybe someone will propose his undying love for me during a hot air balloong adventure. It can happen to us normal creatures, too.
I don't remember who they were or what the title of the movie was, but I do remember scoffing at that particular scene and thinking how unrealistic it was. I said to myself, "Now that only happens in movies."
Another particular scene that I remember from a different movie is that a complete stranger comes up, introduces himself to you and asks for your number. "That only happens in movies." Same line but followed immediately by a rather unladylike and loud snort.
Apparently it doesn't just happens in movies.
Granted, both examples above only happened once each in my whole life. (The escalator scene happened just a while ago at Mall of Asia. The guy who introduced himself to me happened to be my first boyfriend who I've broken up with more than 10 years ago). But at least I know that it does happen and those scenes aren't just figments of the writer's imagination.
I will be first to admit when I'm wrong and this is one of those times. One probably shouldn't shoot down romantic and goosebump-able ideas and deem them unrealistic just because one hasn't experienced them yet.
Who knows? Maybe someone will propose his undying love for me during a hot air balloong adventure. It can happen to us normal creatures, too.
Saturday, June 16, 2007
Women of Value
June 15, 2007
He who touches you touches the apple of His eye.
- Zechariah 2:8
It was during the time that my dad got sick with cancer and stroke that I realized just how far apart I am from my spiritual side. You know how people normally pray during desperate times? Well, I didn't even pray a single time throughout my dad's illness. THAT scared me and prompted me to stop pushing my spirituality aside until a more convenient time. I realized that I have become so emotionally detached from God that my spiritually ispractically non-existent. I have been spiritually barren for more more than a dozen years now, whether deliberate or not.
I attended my first bible study last night. I met a group of genuinely warm and God-fearing adults who seriously believe that being Christ-centered can do more good than evil. The group is also there to share stories from their own experiences that will help the rest of the group think about similar choices that they've done.
Main Message
The woman of God knows she is valuable and has worth because Jesus Christ is in her life. The first step towards self-esteem is acceptance by faith that "I have value because God accepts me."
What Made It Difficult For Me To Swallow
1. Because of previous horrible situations, I have trouble accepting blessings and good fortune at face value. I find myself disbelieving and challenging everything that seems good before accepting them. But understanding this self-inflicted destructive pattern has helped me realize that this is not helping me achieve anything positive in my life. I should strive to believe that I am worthy of being loved and showered with blessings in life.
2. Normally people measure their worth by their achievements, their status, their children's successes or how well-matched they are with their respective partners. But what is the real measure of worth? If you suddenly lose your job, your children become drug addicts and you find yourself divorced from your husband, does that make you any less worthy or less valuable? We have to shift our current thinking vs the real worth. It is proven time and time again that material things are not reliable - meaning they can either break or we can lose them. We should strive to find our worth not from external sources but from something more lasting and reliable.
3. Believe me, I have committed my fair share of sins, in my short 28 years on Earth. I may not be a serial killer nor a terrorist, but I am not a completely nice person all the time. Why should Christ stand by me and die for me, when I clearly did not deserve any of it? Well, I guess it just is. That is how powerful God's love is for us. It has no ifs and no buts. We are sinners, yet we are loved. I guess I should stop beating myself up for all of my past mistakes and start believing and loving myself first.
Status
Being the cynical and logical person that I am, you should've guessed that I am still not fully convinced that "God is the way." -- No way, not after just 3 hours of stimulating discussion and great company.
But I do know that I am one baby step closer to seeing the light and one step farther away from detachment and emptiness. And I do know that I am going back next Friday again to listen to what lessons I might learn from all the other folks in the room. Thanks to my friends who have continuously prayed even though I did not believe.
He who touches you touches the apple of His eye.
- Zechariah 2:8
It was during the time that my dad got sick with cancer and stroke that I realized just how far apart I am from my spiritual side. You know how people normally pray during desperate times? Well, I didn't even pray a single time throughout my dad's illness. THAT scared me and prompted me to stop pushing my spirituality aside until a more convenient time. I realized that I have become so emotionally detached from God that my spiritually ispractically non-existent. I have been spiritually barren for more more than a dozen years now, whether deliberate or not.
I attended my first bible study last night. I met a group of genuinely warm and God-fearing adults who seriously believe that being Christ-centered can do more good than evil. The group is also there to share stories from their own experiences that will help the rest of the group think about similar choices that they've done.
Main Message
The woman of God knows she is valuable and has worth because Jesus Christ is in her life. The first step towards self-esteem is acceptance by faith that "I have value because God accepts me."
What Made It Difficult For Me To Swallow
1. Because of previous horrible situations, I have trouble accepting blessings and good fortune at face value. I find myself disbelieving and challenging everything that seems good before accepting them. But understanding this self-inflicted destructive pattern has helped me realize that this is not helping me achieve anything positive in my life. I should strive to believe that I am worthy of being loved and showered with blessings in life.
2. Normally people measure their worth by their achievements, their status, their children's successes or how well-matched they are with their respective partners. But what is the real measure of worth? If you suddenly lose your job, your children become drug addicts and you find yourself divorced from your husband, does that make you any less worthy or less valuable? We have to shift our current thinking vs the real worth. It is proven time and time again that material things are not reliable - meaning they can either break or we can lose them. We should strive to find our worth not from external sources but from something more lasting and reliable.
3. Believe me, I have committed my fair share of sins, in my short 28 years on Earth. I may not be a serial killer nor a terrorist, but I am not a completely nice person all the time. Why should Christ stand by me and die for me, when I clearly did not deserve any of it? Well, I guess it just is. That is how powerful God's love is for us. It has no ifs and no buts. We are sinners, yet we are loved. I guess I should stop beating myself up for all of my past mistakes and start believing and loving myself first.
Status
Being the cynical and logical person that I am, you should've guessed that I am still not fully convinced that "God is the way." -- No way, not after just 3 hours of stimulating discussion and great company.
But I do know that I am one baby step closer to seeing the light and one step farther away from detachment and emptiness. And I do know that I am going back next Friday again to listen to what lessons I might learn from all the other folks in the room. Thanks to my friends who have continuously prayed even though I did not believe.
Friday, June 15, 2007
Thoughts on Being an Effective Trainer
I had the pleasure of being invited to a focus group discussion with our company's General Manager, Jim Lafferty. Aside from being a key business leader and strategist, he is also passionate about training and building the people. I can personally attest to this since I have seen this drive consistently exhibited from all of the training sessions that he had conducted in the past.
I would like to share some key thoughts that I had taken away from the roomful of equally passionate trainers from office.
1. First and foremost, you should have a desire to teach. One cannot coach another to have desire. It's either you have it or you don't. Maybe you were forced to train because of direct mandates from higher management. Maybe you figured it would look good on your resume or on your work plan results. Regardless of the reasons, if you don't have that initial passion to learn and share what you have learned, don't assume that you'll be able to fool your audience into thinking otherwise.
2. Credibility is key. Having trainers with the right qualifications and experience will build the right level of confidence. If you are not the experts in that particular area, do not even think about volunteering. You are just asking for "difficult audiences" who will forever oppose what you are preaching because they do not believe you have a right to teach it in the first place.
3. Customize your training materials. Do not just take something that HR or your counterparts from other regions used and present it as-is. Throw in your own personal touch. Add experiences that you are passionate about. Rest assured, it will come out to be more comfortable and effective - ergo, more "you."
4. All trainers should be able to sense the audience's emotions. Being a great trainer means that you can assess quickly whether your audience need a short exercise to get their blood pumping, or when they are impatient to go to the next slide because they already understand the main point. One should be able to see subtle cues so that they will be able to react and plan their strategy quickly. The training session is definitely not the time to be oblivious.
5. Engage and put your audience at ease. You can achieve this by making them laugh within the first 120 seconds of your training. This is a guaranteed way to endear you to your audience. Empathize with them. Put a little humor at just the right timing and right manner. With the gazillion of available jokes in the Internet, you'll surely be able to find a suitable one for the topic that you're training on. Your job is to teach them as much as it is to entertain them. You have to earn the right for them to listen to you. Don't expect everyone to sit up and take notes just because you happen to be a Vice-President of the biggest selling brand in your region.
6. Treat your audience with dignity and respect. No matter how pissed you may be at the intern who is dozing off in the middle of your favorite anecdote, or the know-it-all participant who kept jumping in and asking senseless questions that are the complete opposite of what you just discussed, do not embarrass your audience. Be subtle on how you give your feedback. As much as possible, ensure that you give the message in the right way.
7. Do not overcomplicate the subject matter. This is where storytelling techniques are used to make the topic more memorable. Use analogies and real-life examples to get people to understand your point. Don't limit yourself into thinking that this is not applicable for technical or functional trainings. A great teacher can make the world's most boring subject interesting and understandable. Recall how your own mother explained what is gravity or why there are raindrops. I'm sure she didn't read off what is exactly stated in Wikipedia (or the equivalent encyclopedia then). She stuck with the basic message but added her own creativity and translated it into a language that was understood by a 7-year old.
8. Training or teaching is an art, not a science. At the end of the day, no matter how many self-help manuals you may have read about training, or how great your mentor is, it is still a continuous process of learning and re-learning. There is no sure fire way of achieving a perfect evaluation score. But if you have passion for learning and sharing what you have learned with others, just continue to build on that passion. There are only a few things more satisfying than hearing your previous students walk up to you and say, "I still remember your blue monkey example or your arrow experiement."
Again, a big salute to all trainers and teachers out there! The world would not be as good as it is now without your neverending passion for knowledge and learning.
I would like to share some key thoughts that I had taken away from the roomful of equally passionate trainers from office.
1. First and foremost, you should have a desire to teach. One cannot coach another to have desire. It's either you have it or you don't. Maybe you were forced to train because of direct mandates from higher management. Maybe you figured it would look good on your resume or on your work plan results. Regardless of the reasons, if you don't have that initial passion to learn and share what you have learned, don't assume that you'll be able to fool your audience into thinking otherwise.
2. Credibility is key. Having trainers with the right qualifications and experience will build the right level of confidence. If you are not the experts in that particular area, do not even think about volunteering. You are just asking for "difficult audiences" who will forever oppose what you are preaching because they do not believe you have a right to teach it in the first place.
3. Customize your training materials. Do not just take something that HR or your counterparts from other regions used and present it as-is. Throw in your own personal touch. Add experiences that you are passionate about. Rest assured, it will come out to be more comfortable and effective - ergo, more "you."
4. All trainers should be able to sense the audience's emotions. Being a great trainer means that you can assess quickly whether your audience need a short exercise to get their blood pumping, or when they are impatient to go to the next slide because they already understand the main point. One should be able to see subtle cues so that they will be able to react and plan their strategy quickly. The training session is definitely not the time to be oblivious.
5. Engage and put your audience at ease. You can achieve this by making them laugh within the first 120 seconds of your training. This is a guaranteed way to endear you to your audience. Empathize with them. Put a little humor at just the right timing and right manner. With the gazillion of available jokes in the Internet, you'll surely be able to find a suitable one for the topic that you're training on. Your job is to teach them as much as it is to entertain them. You have to earn the right for them to listen to you. Don't expect everyone to sit up and take notes just because you happen to be a Vice-President of the biggest selling brand in your region.
6. Treat your audience with dignity and respect. No matter how pissed you may be at the intern who is dozing off in the middle of your favorite anecdote, or the know-it-all participant who kept jumping in and asking senseless questions that are the complete opposite of what you just discussed, do not embarrass your audience. Be subtle on how you give your feedback. As much as possible, ensure that you give the message in the right way.
7. Do not overcomplicate the subject matter. This is where storytelling techniques are used to make the topic more memorable. Use analogies and real-life examples to get people to understand your point. Don't limit yourself into thinking that this is not applicable for technical or functional trainings. A great teacher can make the world's most boring subject interesting and understandable. Recall how your own mother explained what is gravity or why there are raindrops. I'm sure she didn't read off what is exactly stated in Wikipedia (or the equivalent encyclopedia then). She stuck with the basic message but added her own creativity and translated it into a language that was understood by a 7-year old.
8. Training or teaching is an art, not a science. At the end of the day, no matter how many self-help manuals you may have read about training, or how great your mentor is, it is still a continuous process of learning and re-learning. There is no sure fire way of achieving a perfect evaluation score. But if you have passion for learning and sharing what you have learned with others, just continue to build on that passion. There are only a few things more satisfying than hearing your previous students walk up to you and say, "I still remember your blue monkey example or your arrow experiement."
Again, a big salute to all trainers and teachers out there! The world would not be as good as it is now without your neverending passion for knowledge and learning.
Thursday, June 14, 2007
The Art of Storytelling
I think one of the best skills that a great leader and role model should have is the art of storytelling.
It's more than just having excellent communication skills. I have met a lot of colleagues who write crisp and concise memos, but I don't necessarily regard them as great influencers.
Somehow, someway, it is being able to relate your insights to a broad audience and retain your message in their minds. It means you get them to think and assess on whether you are making sense or not. You also get them glued to their seats and hanging on to your every word. And you manage to do all this within the first 10 minutes after you start talking!
This talent is usually present among people who are passionate about building the people and organization - trainers, facilitators, mentors, coaches, teachers, parents, priests, etc. They are the "unsung heroes" versus let's say, somebody who had created the actual commercial for Pantene or the star of a musical show. But their contribution to society is equal, if not far greater.
People who have this gift should never stop telling stories. They should persist in listening and learning from new experiences and add on to what they currently have. They should believe in the value that they bring to the people, even though it might not be appreciated immediately.
Thanks to all the people who have continuously shared a part of their lives to me and told great stories that inspire and influence my life! You know who you are.
It's more than just having excellent communication skills. I have met a lot of colleagues who write crisp and concise memos, but I don't necessarily regard them as great influencers.
Somehow, someway, it is being able to relate your insights to a broad audience and retain your message in their minds. It means you get them to think and assess on whether you are making sense or not. You also get them glued to their seats and hanging on to your every word. And you manage to do all this within the first 10 minutes after you start talking!
This talent is usually present among people who are passionate about building the people and organization - trainers, facilitators, mentors, coaches, teachers, parents, priests, etc. They are the "unsung heroes" versus let's say, somebody who had created the actual commercial for Pantene or the star of a musical show. But their contribution to society is equal, if not far greater.
People who have this gift should never stop telling stories. They should persist in listening and learning from new experiences and add on to what they currently have. They should believe in the value that they bring to the people, even though it might not be appreciated immediately.
Thanks to all the people who have continuously shared a part of their lives to me and told great stories that inspire and influence my life! You know who you are.
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